Ouch! Sweetie

Fuck me! I leapt around the kitchen doorway, just before 5pm yesterday, to answer the phone, landing on my left foot just inside the kitchen. I felt my left calf muscle go, excruciatingly so. It felt like the muscle rolled around my leg bone and then rolled back again. I collapsed onto the bench with the phone to my mouth saying hello, breathlessly, trying not to scream into the receiver. Of course, there was nobody there.

Now I can't walk.

Well, I can walk if I turn my foot out like a penguin, but if I try to walk in a straight line, it feels like somebody is driving a knife into my calf.

I called the doctor, who couldn't fit me in, naturally, but I wasn't sure how I was going to get there anyway, as I drive a manual car.

Call first thing in the morning, the receptionist said. And we'll try to fit you in.