I just waste the morning on the couch watching random YouTube channels, and then when it looks like I have done maximum time wasting I get to American sovereign citizens YouTube clips. They are just weird. It’s kinda hard to explain why they do what they do. I think it’s where America’s poor education system comes home to roost with what appears to be the stupidest people. I assume they are probably just poorly educated, in America's conservative led increasingly poor education system. Who believes the nonsense of sovereign citizens, it makes no sense whatsoever. Anyway, it’s kind of interesting to watch it because it’s, you know, like not being able to take your eyes off a car crash as you drive past. It is appealing in the sense that you just can’t understand there are people who act like this. They just talk shit, absolute shit, which they appear to wholeheartedly believe, which is the more mind-boggling aspect of the whole thing. Here is an ideology of complete nonsense that has been bought wholeheartedly by a significant number of the population. It’s just mind-boggling how this conspiracy theory rubbish is taken up by people.
As we get closer to the middle of the day, Sam says, “come on let’s go and do shopping for the week,” which also means getting lunch afterwards. Sam is not a breakfast person, like I am, so he starts to get hungry as the day progresses, where I can just lie on the couch and waste my life at lightning speed. I have no problem with indulging in the waste of time Olympics, rightly or wrongly.
So, as we edge towards midday, Sam has made the call to leave the house. So, we get our shit together, harness up the dog, and we leave the house before midday.
It’s actually a gorgeous day outside, the sun is shining down absolutely beautifully, the sky is a radiant blue overhead, it couldn’t be a nicer day if it tried, well, if I’d been notified of winning $5 million in TattsLotto just before we left the house, then, I guess, it could be a nicer day.
The sun is lovely and warm in which to walk to the shops.
I stop of at The Salvos on our way just to have a sniff about. Sam continues on. I catch up when I am done. I get a couple of seasons of The Durrells, the two seasons that I don't have.
Otto and I sit outside the shopping centre, watching all the cute boys in tight track pants and, sexy men and snug fitting shorts walking into the shopping centre with the shopping bags ready to load up on whatever groceries their little heart’s desire.
Sam does the shopping. He comes back several times with full shopping bags dropping them off with us and taking away empty shopping bags to get more supplies for the week.
It’s kind of nice sitting there watching the world go by with Ottie sitting next to me watching the world go by too, his head and my head moving one way then the other in unison, like the open mouth clowns at the carnival, or those gay boys on the other side of the glory holes waiting for the dicks to slide into their gobs.
Saturday. Is it everyone’s favourite day? The day where you can do anything you like, and the promise of tomorrow is just to repeat the same lazy day. There is no other day in the week quite like it, quiet as fabulous, Saturdays are gay because they are truly fabulous.
I hum a little tune and make up some words while I wait. While the world passes by.
Once the shopping is done, we’ll get some lunch.
Once the shopping is done, we’ll get some lunch.
Once the shopping is done, we’ll get some lunch.
Munch, munch, munch, munch, munch.
Once lunch is consumed, we’ll walk home.
Once lunch is consumed, we’ll walk home.
Once lunch has been consumed, we’ll walk home, in the glorious sunshine.
Once we are home, will be back on the couches with our feet up staring at our screens, once lunch is consumed
Once we’ve got home, we’ll be done
There’s a fat chick just inside the shopping centre doors with what looks like a Portuguese Water Dog that is whining, and yelping, and barking non-stop. Grrr. She has about as much control of that dog as she does over her diet, I think.
Once we’re done in the centre, we’re outside Minh Phat supermarket while Sam shops. We are out of the sun and in a bit of a breeze and suddenly the day isn’t so warm.
A handsome guy comes out of Minh Phat with a box in his hands in green shorts that show off his beefy butt beautifully.
There is a homeless guy sitting just along a bit with a sign asking for money, who is smoking. And, you know, I’m not trying to deny him anything in his life, but smoking is really expensive. And he is asking people to give him money. Just saying.
Ten minutes and Sam reappears
Next, we’re at the Butcher in Victoria Street. Sam says his butcher boyfriend isn’t there, and the aunty who served him was a bitch as she wouldn’t give him any free bones like the guy always does.
As we walk down Victoria Street there is a guy on his bike with his head leaning down on the handle bar, with his arse fully out of his jeans on full display to anyone walking down Victoria Street. It’s not a bad arse either, I have to say.
We’re at the pork roll shop, we’re getting them to take home. Otto and I are standing in the sun, whilst Sam gets the pork rolls, and hopefully a couple of sesame balls.
There is a dark head straight boy in big, baggy shorts standing in front of me. I’d like to check out his sesame balls. Yeah, sure I would, no problem. He’s got a redheaded mate with him, we’d need to separate the two to get a piece of the cute one. Get his big baggy shorts off over his Birkenstocks. Bend his knees until his ankles are around his ears, and then, er, give it all a good lick. Yeah, no problem.
He and his mate are staring at me and smiling, they are looking at Otto, I know that. I smile back at them. Yeah, mate, I have your dick in my mouth, I think. He smiles and nods.
Waiting, waiting, waiting.
The sun is kind of nice. Not too hot. Just nice.
Ten minutes later, we’re off home.
Half an hour later and we’re home
The day is done. We’ve hunted and we gathered. And now it is time to rest.
We eat our pork rolls. We eat our sesame balls.
Sam falls asleep on the couch.
I upload The Durrells to my movie collection.
Otto whines for his ball. Of the three bulldogs we're had, Otto is the biggest whiner.
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