Tuesday, September 16, 2014

We treat people badly and then we are surprised when they react badly

If you cut the dole even for only six months, if you price people out of education, especially those people from lower socio economic back grounds, if you make health care relatively more expensive for the less well off people, if you freeze, cut, or lower the basic wage, if you allow industries to slide away assigning many young men to unemployment, if you allow society to become more unjust and you promote policies that make society more inequitable, if you only govern for the wealthy to make them richer than they are, if you treat the displaced with disregard, or worse, manipulate them for your own gain, you will get more disgruntled young men wanting to fight against the world. You will create more disenfranchised young people who will travel to other countries to participate in war.

Monday, September 15, 2014

A couple of disgruntled militia with a rocket launcher

One of the girl’s at work said she wished that I could stay at the company I am presently working at. They think that I am much more fun than the person I am replacing who is in Europe on holidays.

"Is there anyway you can stay?" she asked. None of the girls in the office really like the person for whom I am filling in. Three don't, one does. I work in an office of girls.

“All we need is a couple of disgruntled militia with a rocket launcher," I said. "And I’d be happy to stay.”

The girl's in the office eyes widened noticeably and they all laughed nervously.

“Too soon?” I asked.

Saturday, September 13, 2014

Shake your torpedo

According to ninemsn, Ricky Martin has been subsiding in Australia for part of the year... (actual wording)

I wonder if that hurts? Do you think he'd be going one leg at a time? Gout then Gangrene? You know, listing like the Costa Concordia at midnight? Melting into the ground one foot at a time. Can you imagine the skin on his feet bursting and his raw flesh being eaten by beetles and spiders and ants. His nails popping off with the worms pushing through. Half man, half earth mound. Flesh like dust, bones like a tinned sardine, dissolving downwards.

I'd believe that before I believed that he was fucking Ian Thorpe? Really? Who believed that? Why would one of the world's most handsome men settle for, well, lets face it, Ian Thorpe is... (I bet she oinks as she gets rogered) not getting prettier with age. I reckon it points towards somebody messing around with plastic surgery.

"Put the Botox down Ian, it is not helping."



not attractive, like a Latin heartthrob

Friday, September 12, 2014

Is Tony Abbott the most disgraceful Australian politician ever?

Prime Minister Tony Abbott has raised Australia's public terror threat from 'medium' to 'high' to boost his ranking in the polls. It is that simple. There have been no threats made against Australia by anybody. There is no intelligence to suggest that anybody is planning to attack Australia. 


When you have failed politically, hit the national security button, it is a sure thing. There is nothing this despicable man won't do to save his politic career? 

I am reminded of the words of Malcolm Fraser, the elder statesman of Tony Abbott's own political party, "I think Tony Abbott would say anything and do anything to gain and retain power."

Wednesday, September 10, 2014

What would I have to do, said David

My friend David has gone overseas, on one of his frequent overseas trips. Before he left we got talking about the safety of flying, you know, with what has happened in the more recent past. (America poking its nose into any country it chooses foreign policy until all of the west is seen as the enemy)

He was saying that flying is, after all, the safest form of transport.

I was saying that you'd have to be an idiot to fly around about now.

He says he does it all the time, which he does.

I was making rocket launcher sound effects, which was interesting, as I have absolutely no idea what a rocket launcher sounds like. A bang and a lot of whooshing of air, I assume.

David said he had Krishna, or Vishnu, or Shiva, or Lakshmi, his personal favourite, or whoever, on his side. Lilly pads, elephants, twenty arms, whatever nonsense that he believes in to keep him safe.

I asked him if he knew what countries he was, actually, flying over?

He said he didn't.

I grimaced and sucked in a lot of air, shrugged and pulled a face.

"You know I'd come back and prove you wrong."

"Good luck with that."

"No, seriously..."

"Seriously?"

"I'd come back and prove it to you."

"What exactly?"

"That you are wrong that this is it, that there is nothing else."

"Tom said the same thing and since it has been roughly seven years since he died, I'm claiming victory with Tom. Nothing."

"What would it take?" said David.

"What would what take?"

"That you knew it was me and that this is only one of many incarnations?"

"Oh please."

"No, come on, what would I have to do?"

"You can live in this flat-earth fantasy, if you want, but don't try to drag me into it yet again."

"What would it take?"

"What would it take?"

"Yes, what would convince you?"

"Haven't we been through this a million times," I said. "You are as bad as the rest of them. I'm not telling you what to believe, so why are you trying..."

"Come on."

"Okay," I said. "Someone would have to walk right up to me."

"A stranger?"

"A stranger, out of the blue," I said. "I would have to see them walking towards me from a distance, see them approaching with some intension. They would have to walk right up to me, stop in front of me, look me in the eye and say, You were wrong. And then simply walk away."

"Okay then," said David.

"Okay then?"

"That's all."

I laughed.

"You'll see."

"Here's to a rocket launcher and some disgruntled militia, to prove a point."