Saturday

6.45am. I was up. Do you know how nice it is to finally be able to fart with confidence, I think. Yay, to the doctors, I guess.

I emptied the dishwasher and made coffee. Ah, the morning, I never really considered myself a morning person, but I guess I am.

7am. Sam was up. It’s kind of early for him, if I said he was intruding on my early morning, it wouldn’t really be true, but I do like my early mornings to myself.

I look for Bob Mizer vintage images. I’d started collecting them yesterday. All those wonderful old images. You know, you start reading about Gisèle Pelicot at 7am and before you know it, you are collecting vintage photos. My morning, welcome to it.

8am. I make vegemite toast and coffee.

8.05am. Otto is up. He comes downstairs with Sam singing Only Love Can Hurt Like This, Paloma Faith.

8.07am. Bruno was up.

Of course, I watch a couple of American political YouTubers, David Pakman, Medias Touch to get warmed up for the day.

I watch Old Skool Only – It’s Ready! LC Torana Build Pt8

I watch Iron Trap Garage – Making Progress On The Custom Chop For The 1939 Mercury Coupe

8.30am. Sam feeds the dogs.

I collect Bob Mizer images for most of the morning.

Sam cleans up, the house and the pond.

Jills Birthday. I sent her a message, Happy 102 birthday.

11:27 am. I go to the supermarket to get grated cheese and butter, I’m gonna make lasagna.

A dark blond-haired boy walks out of Coles ahead of me who has the most sensational legs in a pair of black shorts. Thick, muscular and lightly hairy. I’d like to run my hand up them. Cute face, I’d like to see its reaction as my hand up his leg grabbed his nuts.

11.47am. I’m in St Marks Recycle, just to have a sniff around. Chuckle, I think I like the smell of opshops. They have nothing I want. The nice volunteer asks where the bulldogs are?

“Asleep under the coffee table when I left.”

“It’s a dog’s life,” she says.

“I went to Coles first so I couldn’t bring them with me,” I say.

I’m walking back down Smith Street. Sam has now messaged me for a second time to get long beans this time, before it was bones.

I cross Smith Street thinking I could go to Woolworths to get the beans. But, then I think, Woolies veggies are all the way at the back of the shop, where Coles vegies is at the front of the shop, so I decide to go to Coles and get the beans.

11.49. One of the brainless and unfortunate was walking in the middle of Smith Street, like yesterday when I took the dogs for a walk, there was another one, seemingly oblivious to the traffic. Why is it the down and out seem to have no traffic skills?

11:51am. I am back in Coles to get long beans for Sam. I don’t know how many, so I just grab a few handfuls and stuff them in a bag.

11.56am. I’m walking home.

Midday. I am home.

I’m listening to The Rolling Stones, Tattoo You.

I make cheese sauce.

I put the lasagne together. I made the meat sauce yesterday.

12.50pm. I’d finished making the lasagne, washed the dishes and all.

We ate instant noodles with left over fried chicken for lunch.

I’m collecting Bruce of LA images. I love old black & white photos, you know, especially modern images, or what were once modern. It helps if they are a little edgy, I kind of think an ingredient of modernism.

We take the Bulldogs for a walk. The sun is shining. The sky is blue with wispy clouds.

We turn into Nicholson Street. The sun is shining, it’s lovely and warm out of the breeze.

Douglas, the Scotty Dog, comes running down his hallway to bark at Otto and Bruno, but we passed his gate by the time he does that, so Otto didn’t get to spa with him. Otto always wants to leap about with him from the other side of the fence.

We walk through the side streets and cross over Brunswick Street. 

People in the outdoor section of the Black Cat, which was full of people, want to say hello to the bulldogs. Some woman gets them the bowl of water to drink. Another woman tries to bring the attention back to her small curly-haired dog. I am sensing competition. I’m really not sure why. She had ‘those’ eyes, you know, big and demanding. Me me, me me.

There is a wedding at St Marks, which is over and the people are all coming out of the church. The bride and groom drive away in a 1960 220S Mercedes (W111) with cans tied to the back of it. Some of those cans become detached as they drive away and are left in the middle of the street.

They have a coach waiting out the front. They seem to have two more coaches further down George Street.

One of the guests heading to their coach, or car, picked up the discarded cans and put them in one of the nearby houses’ bins.

The house just over Moor Street, which has been sold recently, had what appeared to be its new owners out the front, and consequently its front door was open and their brown Labrador came out to suss out the bulldogs. He and Otto kind of do those dog circles until the labrador’s owners took control of him and ushered him back inside.

Then we’re home.

I continue collecting Bruce of LA images.

The guy who sent me the 3 CD Rolling Stones CD messaged and asked if I received disk number one that he sent. 

Originally, he’d sent me a 3 disk collection with two dick twos and no disk one.

He then asked if I had post back to him the duplicate of disk 2. I hadn’t. I had the envelop all prepared to send, but I hadn’t actually sent it. He didn’t send me any stamps for post, like he said he would. 

So, he had my address taped on the front of his postal bag with tape, so I peeled it off and stuck it over his return address on the back. Then I wrote his address on the front and taped up the package without putting any more stamps on it.

5.15pm. I walk the bulldogs to the post box to post it. I was only taking Otto, but Bruno looked as though he wanted to come, so I took him. That was a mistake.

We got half way up to the postbox and Bruno wouldn’t walk. He lay down on the footpath.

5.23pm. I asked Sam to come and get Bruno. This was meant to be a simple trip to the post box. Grrrr!

I decided we should walk back to meet Sam coming to meet us. As soon as I said, “Come on, let’s go home,” Bruno got straight up and walked. He is just a brat.

We tried walking all of us to the post box, when Sam got there. We hadn’t gone very far, and Bruno lay down again. So, Sam took them both home, as Otto would look for Bruno if we separated them, and as soon as they started heading home, Bruno walked just fine once again when they were heading for home.

5.40am. I’m home again.

We watched the end of Deal or no Deal. It was a repeat, the one with the 98 year old gut who was trying to win money for a cruise. I’m not sure if we agreed on it being a repeat, but we both agreed we wanted to suck his handsome grandson’s dick.

We ate lasagne for dinner.

We watched Dog House.

We watched Vera. It was a repeat, we’d seen it before, although we couldn’t agree on that fact.

We turned the TV off. 

I fell asleep on the couch watching CorvetteBen and the worst. C3 Corvette he’d ever seen and bought, which he bought sight unseen off MarketPlace, or some such selling app.

10.30pm. We went to bed.

I re-watched the bits of CorvetteBen I’d slept through.

11.11pm. Lights out.