Wednesday, July 12, 2017

I Had A Dream

I got up sometime after 5am and had a piss. As it has been cold this week, Buddy has been sleeping in our room, he is supposed to sleep in his own bed at the foot of our bed but that seems to be a lost cause, now there is a surprise. He had leapt up onto the bed sometime in the night and had taken up the key position between Sam and I and, quite frankly, he was hogging the doona, and I kind of only drifted back to sleep a bit, not fully. I guess it was fair to say I dozed.

I’d had a dream and I was kind of processing that too, running it through my head trying to make sense of it.

I, we, (whoever that was) had to go up a river to find a meeting place. We were leaving from a large river junction, where 2 rivers met. We had to wade through the water to get to the meeting place, certainly at the last bit, if not for most of it.

“But it is easy,” they said. “And not far, in the actual water, just several hundred metres, at the most.”

I was the last to head up the river, I’m not sure why. I was unsure of the direction, or where I had to go, which was making me nervous. I remember feeling nervous.

As I dithered, or as I was about to leave, I tried to text people I knew for conformation of the directions, but nobody was answering me. So I hesitated. Then I met Jane, (my step-daughter) who said she’s been at the meeting place, but now she was on her way back.

“Yes, everybody is there,” she said. “Don’t worry about the last bit, when you will have to wade through water, as it is not very long.”

Then I meat Leah (Borg) (my now estranged, in real life, ex-girlfriend) who was telling me it was easy.

“Not a problem, my gym work certainly paid off,” she said. “Do you have a regular exercise regime?” I didn’t answer her question. She was doing, what seemed like, stretches. “I didn’t find it a problem.” Self satisfied smile. “But then I am quite fit.” I walked off mumbling, “Shut the fuck up and get the fuck out of my life.”

The river was wide, the undergrowth thick, with huge towering cliffs for banks. Instead of walking up the river bank, I walked along the ridge up onto the top of the cliffs and along, not really sure where I was going, but I was heading in the right direction. I suddenly stumbled into a gay guys flat. (someone I knew in the past, on the gay scene, who was weird, but I can’t quite place him now) In my embarrassment of accidently barging in on him, in my attempt to find an exit, I stumbled into his cement sheet lined bathroom. He followed, of course. I sweet-talked him, and he very quickly realised what I was saying was the truth, that I wasn’t a threat, and it was all just an accident, me being there at all.

“Sorry, sorry,” I said. “I’m lost and I have accidently stumbled in here.”

“But I have trade arriving right now,” he said. “What am I going to tell him?”

“Tell him I am your brother.”

“Yes,” he said. “I’ll tell him you are my brother.”

Falling into character quickly, as the hook-up came through the front door, and we came out of the bathroom, we linked arms. “Okay mate, good to see you,” I said.

“Yes, good to see you too bro,” he said.

He greeted the trade, and I exited through the front door.

Then I was stumbling down an embankment and into a lagoon. The bank swept around in a horse shoe shape, there were willow trees hanging down into the water. I walked around the bank, there were groups of men, but I knew Sam had left, I had missed him.

Then I saw Mark and Luke sitting with a large group of men whom I didn’t know. I walked up and joined them. “Hey,” I said. I sat with them.

I sat next to Luke. Mark sat at the other end of the group of men. One of the men had just rolled a joint. The roller puffed on the joint and then passed it over my head to Luke, who puffed on the joint. I knew Luke would pass the joint away from me, because that is what he has always done. It was a large group of men and I knew it would never make it around to me again. But when he had finished, he passed it back over my head to the man who’d rolled it. So, I still had the same problem, it would be passed away from me and had no hope of coming all the way around to me. I thought bugger it.

“Can I have a puff on that?” I asked.

I could sense a feeling of disapproval in the air at my request, as though I had gone out of turn, and despite the man who rolled it not wanting to hand it back to me, he did. As I took hold of the joint, it fell apart in my hands.

I woke up.

I got up around 6am.

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