A Beautiful Day

It was a beautiful day, the sun was shining down in that crystal clear way that makes the whole world sparkle and seem full of clear, fresh air that hazes, just a little, above the concrete covered ground. Bright. Sharp, with a kind of gentle edge. The blue sky, the glowing orb of a sun; the autumn elves are dancing their last waltz in the final translucence of summer, as it slips completely from sight for another hibernation of winter.

Ben stopped his car at the tram terminus in the line of traffic waiting for the, three in a row, trams to dock in the terminus, or to continue their journeys to the city. Lines clicked this way and that. Staff changed shifts, one on, one off. Trams sat unmanned in the interim, the new roster weren’t, seemingly, as keen to start their shifts as the old roster were to be finishing theirs.

A mess of cars and a conglomeration of transport vehicles massed together in the mean time forming a knot outside the tram terminus.

People are stupid, Ben thought. They stop and wait like begging dogs, for a command from the tramways workers. It’s ignorance, really. Or fear, maybe. People don’t, quite, know what to do when confronted with a stationary tram. They let the fear of them getting it wrong paralyse any rational thought on the matter. Common sense should prevail. A stationary tram with passengers, as they say, alighting, getting off, should make sense. Stop. Nobody wants to have a body, with a shocked look, disappear under the front of their car, now do they? But, a stationary, sitting tram with no passengers at all… proceed with caution… how hard can it be?

Ben didn’t really care, though, as the warm sun was shining in through his driver’s window and he was in no hurry, really, to get any where. But stupidity annoyed him no matter what his schedule was. A tram heading the other way pulled up at the tram stop on the other side of the road. The new trams have big, picture windows, which frame the occupants well, like huge display cases, or exhibits at the zoo.

Josh’s eyes ran along the tram-car windows lazily.

Cute guy with vacant look. Girl with red frizzy hair pulled into a bun on the top of her head, also with a vacant look. She had to be smart or there was no god. Josh laughed to himself. Another cute guy, vacant look… no, refocused. Attention gained. Eyes connected with Bens. Smile. Ben couldn’t help but smile too. The stranger’s mouth pulled up into a grin at the same time Ben’s mouth did. Ben felt a small thrill surge down his spine.

They both looked away, momentarily. Is it because nobody wants to be caught returning a smile when it turns out that the original smile wasn’t, in fact, intended for them? “Oh hello,” they say as the embrace the person behind you. Is it because we are all essentially shy, well, upon first meeting. Ben thought it was fear, the worst thing that any of us can be guilty of was making a fool of ourselves. Maybe?

Ben looked back, to see the stranger staring back at him. The stranger smiled again, Ben did too. Their eyes danced with the delight of each other’s gaze. Stupid, self conscious smiles, like making faces in a mirror, or at young children. Kind of. Not really. Nice, what life’s all about. However, they were, by then, both looking at each other, any pretence of not doing so abandoned.

They were quickly making unashamed eyes at each other. Flirting. The attraction was obvious. The interest was keen. Palpable, even through thick picture window glass, some metres apart. Love on the tracks, Ben thought, which made him laugh, which made the stranger laugh, too. Like a reflection.

Beautiful, Ben thought. He’s beautiful.

Ben’s line of traffic moved forward a car length. Ben looked back, to see the stranger looking backwards towards him. Ben raised his hand, instinctively, and waved good bye, with a half wave, like the Queen of England might do. But, in Ben’s case, it was a sad waved, yes it was, Ben had to admit it. A good bye wave, a nice to know you, for the brief moment we knew each other, wave. Even a I-would-have-liked-to-have-known-you-a-little-better wave. So long, have a nice life, kind of wave.

Stupid really. Some people say that the people whose gaze you capture are the people with who you have unfinished business from a past life, and for the length of time you are connected that is the length of unfinished business that the two of you had. If it was only brief eye contact on the street, you know, just in passing, that was probably the finish of that relationship for all eternity.

Ben wasn’t sure if he believed that, but it always came to mind when there were people with whom he would have liked to have a longer relationship…no matter how tenuous the relationship was to start with.

Ben’s line of traffic moved forward again. Suddenly, he wasn’t thinking anyone was so stupid. He looked nonchalantly in his rear vision mirror, wistfully back at the notion of love, the possibility of, travelling away from him.

There standing in the middle of the brightly lit road was the stranger, jacket in one hand, bag in the other, pushing forward with his chest, moving through the almost stationary line of traffic towards Ben.

He was surprised.

The traffic in front of him cleared, lurched forward and the car in front was gone, going, accelerating away. It was Ben’s turn to do the same. He looked ahead. Looked behind. Looked ahead and then behind again. There was suddenly nobody in front of him, nobody stopping him, nobody impeding his get away.

Ben hesitated. He could feel his pulse quicken with surprise and, as Frankenfurter would have said, anticipation. No, couldn’t be. He shook his head. Was he afraid of making a fool of himself? The other guy had only just realised at the last minute that he was at his stop and got off. It was that simple. So, why was the stranger walking up the centre of the road towards Ben?

Couldn’t be. No.

Could be? Why else?

Ben wanted the stranger to wave his hand, make a gesture to allay Ben’s disbelief. Something? Like, now running up the centre of the road wasn’t enough of a gesture.

The car behind tooted. Ben refocused on the driver behind, who was gently swishing forward with her fingers over her steering wheel for Ben to move. He put the car into gear and revved the engine. Then he pushed his indicator lever down and pulled to the left. The woman behind gave Ben the “look” with the rotating head swivel as she drove past.

Ben tapped his fingers on the steering wheel, as the stranger approached his driver’s door.

“Hi” said the stranger. He stepped away from the driver’s door, nervously.

“Hi,” said Ben.

“You’ve got a nice smile,” said the stranger.

“Thanks,” said Ben. “So have you.”

“My names Will.” He smiled self-consciously, like there was a lot riding on it. Gone was the beautiful, relaxed smile through the glass.

“I’m Ben.”

“Like the flower pot men.” Will smiled.

Ben must have looked confused.

“Bill and Ben,” said Will almost as an exclamation.

Ben couldn’t help but laugh. “So…” Will was adorable. “Do you often get off trams for strange men?”

“No, never,” said Will. “Well, maybe not never.” He smiled that beautiful smile again, raising his hands up and down as if intimating a balancing act. “Never a tram and a car, though, in broad day light, in the street.” He shrugged. “But, I thought fuck it. Why not. You got to take chances in life and I never take enough of those. None of us do.”

“None of us?”

“I don’t,” said Will. “Not nearly often enough.” He stepped forward and touched the side of Bens’ face with his open hand, through the car window. He rubbed Ben’s cheek, stroked Ben’s hair. He stepped back. “You know, like that.”

The two men smiled at each other.

“You can do that again,” said Ben.

“Ha, ha.”

“Where are you heading?” asked Ben.

“I guess…” Cheeky smile. “Where you are.”

“What if I’m going to a wedding… or a funeral?”

“I’m good at weddings and I have a hanky.” Will pulled an actual cloth handkerchief from his pocket. “Are you?”

“Well, no.”

“Where are you going?”

“I don’t know,” said Ben. “Do any of us know?”

“Why do you think I’m standing here?”

“Do you want to come?”

“To… I don’t know?”

“Sure,” said Ben. “I here it’s lovely this time of year.”

“Count me in,” said Will. “Do you think it will lead any where?”

“Get in,” said Ben. “I don’t know, but if you never take a chance you’ll never know, hey?”

Will walked around the front of the car, holding Ben’s gaze as he did. He opened the passenger side door. “Do you often pick up strange boys in the street?”

“No,” said Ben. “This is the first time.

Will closed the door and smiled at Ben. “That’s gotta mean something.”

Ben reached out and touched the side of Will’s face with his open hand, rubbed Will’s cheek, stroked Will’s hair.

Will beamed.

“Gotta take a chance,” said Ben.

“That’s what they say.”