Bitch Fight!

While I was following the cute guy yesterday, and not very well, as you can see, there was a girl on a bike who stopped at the pedestrian crossing when the light turned orange. Another girl on a bike coming down the road behind didn't see that the first girl on her bike had stopped at the lights until the last minute, at which point she jammed on her brakes and went straight over her handle bars and landed on the ground, like a bag of shit. Splat!

That would have made a much better photo, was all I could think.

As it turned out, the second girl got up off the ground really pissed at the first girl.

"The light was orange, you go through, you don't stop." Her voice was rising up through the volume levels. "Everybody knows that."

"I'm sorry," said the first girl. "Are you okay?"

"Oh fuck off, I have to get to work."

"Are you hurt?"

The second girl threw her hind of beef over her mount and pushed off, riding away. "Fuck you!"

So, the first girl, who was perfectly in the right, was gracious enough to apologise and enquire about the health of the second girl, who obviously wasn't concentrating on what she was doing, or watching where she was going. And what was the second girl's response to the generosity of the first girl? She abused her. She was pissed! She just got back on her bike and rode off, when the first girl was mid sentence.

We're funny, aren't we? Just lovely, us human beings? All she would have needed to do was to punch the first girl, pow! Or would that be thwack! That would have been perfect, right there in the middle of peak hour traffic. smack! Lovely!

The newspapers could have reported it as a Bikie Turf War.

"Anger erupts in peak hour. Ugly scenes as rival bike gang members  turn to violence!"

Except the protagonist here was a fat slapper in thick tights, rather than a tattooed behemoth named Killer. And quite possibly they'd be bitch slapping each other rather than using baseball bats.

But, I would have captured those images, don't you worry about that... as I watched all the straight boys slip their hands into the pockets of their trousers.