Thursday, February 21, 2013

Going Shopping, If I Like It, Or Not

I woke at 7.30am. I rolled over in the bed and Sam wasn’t there. I needed a piss. The bathroom door was closed, I knocked.

“What?”

“What are you doing?”

“Pooh. Go downstairs.”

I stumbled down the stairs, not literally.

I came back and got into bed, but I was awake by then and got up.

Sam let Buddy in as soon as he came downstairs and Buddy and I waved him good bye from the gate.


I so wasn’t looking forward to Jill coming over and cleaning out my laundry. She arrived at 10.30am, with bed linen, I was on the defensive. She proceeded to make up the bed in the front room, as I was uncommunicative. I felt grumpy.

She wanted to go shopping. I didn’t want to.

“Come on, we have things to buy.”

“What things?”

“Things for the builder, you know he’ll be here soon enough.”

I went shopping with Jill, begrudgingly. I needed nothing, though, I thought as I was bullied out into the car, by “on a mission” Jill. So as you may understand, I couldn’t get myself out of the bad mood by going shopping. It made I worse.

We went to Swan Street Auctions. We just wandered about aimlessly, looking at sinks, baths and basins. We bought another white basin, as Jill assured me it was smaller than the one we already had. (Ed note – it turned out to be exactly the same size) We walked and walked, until we were covering the same ground for a second time and I felt restless and wanted to go.

We went home to Jill’s place for lunch. It was quiche and some very interesting salads, nuts and beetroot. He father looks like death, like cohabitating with a cadaver.

Then I thought we were heading home, as we got silently in the Jetta and drove away. But we didn’t turn up the first left, in fact, we accelerated and wove over to the outside lane and continued up Dandenong Road.

“Where are we going?”

“Bunnings,” was the almost maniacal reply.

“Why are we going to Bunnings?”

“To get your clothes line.”

“Jill, I don’t want a clothes line, I am not convinced.”

“Well, I want to go.”

“Jill, I hate shopping. I don’t want to go shopping.”

Silence.

We went to Masters, which looked exactly the same as Bunnings, in Warrigul Road in Clayton.

Jill got 2 light globes and a huge blue wheelie bin, which she pulled around behind her, as she proceeded to do a forensic inspection of Masters stock.

I got interested in the drill for a minute, but when there seemed to be an infinite array of them at many and varied speeds and power, I got confused and wandered away. I do need a drill though, to secure the climbing rose to the walls, before it falls apart.

I headed out into the sunshine and pretty soon I had discovered the Woollies just a little way up the causeway. I wanted a drink and cigarettes. At the one check out the 2 check out chicks were checking one mans humungous pile of soft drinks which he had pulled up to the only open register in this section.

I waited and waited, but nobody even seemed to acknowledge my existence. I stepped away for a moment, in a vain attempt to get another employees attention. Just as I did, the second of the check out chicks serving man A, suddenly opened her register. A woman had just stepped in between me and the newly opened checkout. I marched across in front of her and claimed my rightful spot.

“I was here before you,” the woman protested in a Scottish accent.

“No you weren’t,” I said bluntly, in no mood for her nonsense.

“Oh how rude, I was here before you,” she said waiting in line behind me.

I ignored her.

“But, I was here before you!”

I turned and gave her my best exasperated look. “I have been waiting her for over 5 minutes, you only just walked up, so don’t carry on and wait your turn,” I spat at her, with full bitch venom.

She pulled a face as though she had just sucked on a lemon.

Jill caught up with me outside in the sun shine, smoking a cigarette and sipping on mixedberry juice, still sulking, I could feel it. She had the 2 light globes clutched to her breast.

Of course, she wanted to go to the supermarket on the way home, like this day would never end.

“Aldi is great, what do you mean you haven’t tried it?”

“I have never been in an Aldi.”

“So you are in for a treat.”

Some how I doubted it, and I wasn’t disappointed.


I came home and cleaned out the back spouts. It was therapy. It looked like it was going to rain. They were chockablock with refuse. Leaves turned to soil, so I could really claim it was just this last year, I didn’t think, as I lost myself in it. Stress is always released by a little manual labour, it is the best medicine.

I clipped the creeper away from the house. It drops a mountain of leaves into the gutters, otherwise. I’ve poisoned the creeper right up the top of the house. I cut more thick veiny branches, lets see which bits of the remaining jungle that kills. Pruning by killing huge chunks of the creeper. It is taking over the house. Maybe my mother was right?

Sam came home as I was still up the ladder out the back in the late afternoon sunshine.

It rained heavily in parts of Melbourne, but it didn’t rain much here.

Sam and I went to the supermarket and got more sausages and asparagus.

We watched TV.

Sam went to bed at 9.50pm.

I messed about on Facebook. I spoke to Mark and Luke, Hanoi, Federal.

Mark ate garlic prawns, passion fruit smoothie and banana fritters, then he went up to his penhow and called me on Skype.

I went to bed at 12.30am.

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