Stripper

Would you name your daughter Maddison?

We seem to have a rash of them at work lately. Lots of Maddisons, itmust have been a popular name for kids 20 years ago.

Don't you think it sounds like a stripper's name?

Maddison Monroe performing here tonight. Come watch what she does with cumquats!

It just feels like you'd be relegating her to a life where she'd have her snatch out for money for drunk men late into the night.

If she ever rose above the corus line of chick's who take their clothes off for money and got her own place, she could call it Maddison's Minge

What's the boy equivalent? Mitchell, I guess. Maddison and Mitchell could do a double act, Mitchell and Maddison Do Melbourne, oh, but, I guess, that's no longer stripping.

But, let's not be squeamish, Mitchell and Maddison are good sorts. That's why people pay to see them take their clothes off.

Queen of Soul

I've been home on my own the last few days, Sam's had to go to his office, and I've been listening to Renee Geyer, my queen of soul. 

I have been listening to her records oldest to newest. They are just the perfect collection of songs.

You can listen to any of her music, from any era and it still sounds current.

I chuckle to myself, from what I know of Aretha Franklin, who was one of the greatest singers of all time, but from many accounts, a bit of a cunt, she'd be turning in her grave hearing someone else being called Queen of Soul, but Renee was, she earned it. That's all.

Aretha Franklin was Renee's music god. 

I've been home on my own working away, and Renee has been singing for me. She really is perfection.

Working From Home

I'm defying (ha ha, do you like that? I feel like a 17 year old) Boris today. She told me she wanted me to work in the office today, but I'm not going.

Sam has to spend two days in his office, unusual for him, so I am working from home to look after the woofs.

I was going to tell Boris that I will work in the office on Wednesday - they just want me to work one of my days in the office - and I may still do that, but I've decided, initially, I'm just going to say I am working at home today.

I'm torn about this return to the office bullshit, even if it is only for one day a week. I feel like I am being a pussy and just caving in to it.

I've tried to tell them I want to work permanently from home, but they don't really listen, certainly Boris doesn't.

Anyway, we'll see.

What can they do? Sack me. (cross your fingers) Okay, go on then, at least it would make my mind up about resigning.

Oh, I can't decide about resigning? I don't know if I am being stupid, or not. Sam tells me not to resign, and that I am being stupid. 

"It's one day a week," he says. 

But, you know, twice I have spent too long in jobs that made me unhappy, so...

I know one thing, never threaten to resign. Either do it, or continue to state your case for what you want, or why you are unhappy.

Street Party

It was the gay street party near us today. It was hot. We walked up and down for a bit. 

Dykes smoking their cigarettes backwards, drag queens getting in the way trying to be fabulous, fags with dogs, people with cameras with those striking a pose, boys in shorts, girl’s with their tits out, guys with muscles, tall, fat, thin, short, the criminally ugly and the genetically blessed.

I don't know, unless, you are young, and want to get out of it on drugs and dance, and fuck everyone, nyr, it's all a bit, been there done that, many times.

I took my VHS tape out to the northern suburbs to get converted to someone who'd I'd assumed was a 20 something asian kid living with his parents, who turned out to be a middle aged dyke with dogs and a dyke attitude.

So, there you go.

Spent most of the rest of the day on the couch out of the heat.

A Day At The Beach

What to do today? We decide to go to Sandridge Beach. Once the decision is made, we are free to piss the rest of the morning away. Well, we’re going to do stuff, we have made the decision.

12:30pm. We’re in Clarendon Street.

Our usual South Melbourne eating hole is busy with a bunch of braying self focuses, commandeering the tables, even if it might have been questionable that they were even sitting to eat. There seems to be some group that has mindlessly descended en mass. They all have on wrist bands. They have the delusional self confidence, and entitlement, of a Christian Group. We pretty much decide that’s what they are. 

We walk around the corner and eat dumplings in Clarendon Street, which was much nicer anyway. Dappled shade rather than direct sun.

South Melbourne seemingly has its share of men in shorts with nice legs. Oh, sure, I’m a sucker for a nice set of legs.

1pm. We’re heading to the beach.

It was lovely on the beach, perhaps not quite warm enough to swim, even though I wanted to.

We splashed around in the shallows and a lovely time was had by all, on shell beach, which is Sandridge.

Our SPF sunscreen is past its use by date, but I figure that will just take it from a SPF 50, to a SPF 45, perhaps.

(Later, I would read LeTan Watermelon was one of the sun tan lotions that never contain sunscreen at a SPF 50 level, as claimed, so it was, in fact, probably, next to useless, on the beach today)

It goes well on the beach, until Brun decides he wants to chase another dog’s stick. So, I go to retrieve Brun and Otto follows. This chick’s labrador doesn’t like Brun, and then Otto, trying to get the stick and it gets nasty. The Labrador’s owner acts like it is our fault. I don’t know, maybe it was, but I still say it was her Labrador that got nasty first.

The bulldogs go on their leads to avoid any further confrontation.

I am contemplating swimming, but I have to say all these shark bites just lately way heavily on my mind.

The chick with the labrador leaves so we let the bulldogs off their leads again.

The bulldogs splash around again together. Otto seems to want to roll in the shallow water, which is kind of new for him.

Another bunch of slappers start throwing a ball to a German Shepard nearby. Then another guy starts throwing a ball to a Border Collie nearby in the other direction, so we decide to leave.

Sam washes the bulldogs under the outdoor shower things provided, which they hate.

We go for a walk down to the surf living club and beyond, to dry the dogs before we get in the car.

3:30pm. We’re home.

I tried doing stuff on my blog, but I got sleepy. You know when you get that wobbly, sleepy thing happening, when you continually close your eyes for a micro second, well, that was me. Why fight it, I suddenly thought.

I put on Renee Geyer, the end of Winner, on in my headphones. I've been listening to a lot of Renee Geyer, lately, she is my Queen of Soul. 

I fell asleep and slept until 7pm.

We ate leftover Japanese pancake for dinner.

I message David with an image of Doctor Smith with a question mark. We’d talked about, The pain, the pain, yesterday.

He has some pain thing, Fibromyalgia, that flares up from time to time. (No, I wouldn’t call it a look-at-me condition) He had it yesterday.

He replied with, the drugs are lovely.

In The Office, or Not?

Should I resign from my job? Wasn't there the Great Resignation? Yes, well, okay so I'm a few years late for that.

Boris said to me that I should spend every Monday in the office, and I don't want to. After working from home, and experiencing how good that is, going into the office is going to make me unhappy?

Sam, essentially, tells me I am being indulgent. (Yeah, thanks for the support)

Shouldn't I choose happiness in this life which is astonishingly short, after all?

Morning Walk

It was a glorious morning. I took the dogs for a walk early.

The sun shone, there was a lovely breeze.

I was listening to Marvin Gaye, the morning couldn't have been cooler.

I was walking down Brunswick Street, nonchalantly, listening to my music, when this sexy bike rider in tight black shorts, with great legs, was messing around with his panniers on the ground. I took two, maybe three more steps, after this photo was taken – I was taking photos of my dogs, so I had the camera ready to go in my hand – and he bend right over in front of me, just as I walked up behind him, just like that. I could easily have just reached out and grabbed him by the hips.

Oh, could you imagine?

“Ah?”

“Ah!”

Pffffff, it made me think, wild thoughts. He was a good sort. I felt a sly smile appear across my face.

He had no idea what had just happened. No, not a clue.

He got on his bike and rode away.

I kept walking.