Monday, January 31, 2005

(And extra large condoms, to boot)

7am. Feeling good. Doing fine. He, he!

The only thing that I can report is that I'm getting really hungry. Otherwise, feeling good, going fine.

Hungry is GOOD!
I'm feeling ever so slightly shop soiled myself, but have completed my chores and am home safe in Dingley.
Aby had her bedroom door open as I lightly and slowly walked down the stairs and when in the kitchen, I heard some manly grunts and femme groans, and I called out "If you guys are having sex I wanna join you!" All went silent and then the door closed. Ooops.  It honestly didn't cross my mind that they really were. Anyways, Aby's a bit kinky I'm sure she wouldn't mind the cat calling.
I hope you're day progresses in fine form.

He, he, he, he!
You should have barged in and delivered your message. The looks on the faces would have been priceless. (And extra large condoms, to boot)

yes well i always carry my own!
 *smug smile*

I'm feeling great! We should go out every Saturday night and...

I'm in!
Tom J

How are u?
Documents nutter?

I'm good, all things considered. I went to a party on Saturday night and danced with all the boys. And then I slept most of yesterday, as you may expect.
Life's good, still have a cute Greek boy who keeps me warm when I most need it. And he's good at it!
I'll get the documents to you ASAP, except that Pete forgot to sign them on Friday, so I'll have to take them up to the country.
Tom may have his leukaemia back, he finds out this week, I think.

Is that good or bad with Tom?
Lisa hates me!

Um... leukaemia is generally bad. No leukaemia is generally good.
Why does Lisa hate your very lovely self? Did you root around on her?

Nope! Respect her too much for that! Think she just needs more of my time and gets grumpy when I don't spend quality time with her!
How could I this weekend when a mate died. 30, Heart attack. Was Getting married in November
What more can u say!
Christian, I have changed my attitude. I'm living life and not being lived by it!

30! Bloody Hell! Did he have some sort of defect?
More time...more time...I'm not sure if I buy that one. Good for you for not being a "boy" about it all, though. It's the cheating thing that makes girls most upset. Boys don't see it, but they do.
Live life and love life, that's what I say. Every day I try to tell myself, My life is great! (because it is) I think it does your soul good to positively affirm that life is going well.

Nothing wrong Chriso! Sad state of affairs!
As for Lise, let her work it out!

SMS. 13.40. Send this star _/l_ to lots >.< of friends (also to me) if 3 come back, 1 of your dreams will come true tonite. Happy friendship week xxx000 – Rachel
SMS. 13.43. U clearly need more to do, miss! – christian
SMS. 14.42. Knew it would annoy u J – Rachel
SMS. 14.45. Doesn’t annoy me, it makes me laugh! – christian

SMS. 16.00. Hi luv, do ya wanna have an early cheap dinner tonight? – Julien
SMS. 16.03. Sure, Jules…I was going to gym, however… – christian 
SMS. 16.04. Your place at 7 or after gym! – Julien
SMS. 16.06. Cool, see u then – christian
SMS. 17.57. Have u found out the date for Bette? – christian

I think this would make a good name for a character for a story, Angel Dandekar
At dinner at The Old Colonial with Jules, he knew all about the Bette Midler dates.

SMS. 21.04. 18th and 21st of April – christian
SMS. 21.40. Hi hon! 18th would be fab – Leah
SMS. 21.44. Apparently, the 21st is the show to go to, being closing night. I don’t know though, that’s just what someone said – christian
SMS. 21.47. Either way but Mon nite is less leave 4 me 2 take x – Leah
SMS. 23.08. Yr 2 easily amused luv! – Rachel

Sunday, January 30, 2005

Somehow The Dirty Story Seems a Little More Tasteful Than Pooh Holes That Resemble Spag Bog

Tom left for the sauna at 8am. I went to bed. Later, he said it was creatures day at the sauna. Trolls and misfits. The grooms of Frankenstein, slithering and scraping their knuckles on the floor just beyond where the 20 way globes shone. Those who dare not show their faces in the day light. Those who scuttle around the darkened hallways like cockroaches. It was certainly not a night when you risked the dark room with the words, "How bad could it be?" As the good lord would surely be showing you the wizened up monsters he surely was capable of at the next lit viewing. It was a night to keep your whits about you and your hand on the tuck in your towel.

I got up again at 1pm.

Somehow the dirty story seems a little more tasteful than poo holes that resemble spag bog (cant think why don’t want to...) As for the boy you picked up any stories you write may be printed and sent to your mother... this was said with a jealous tone, not that I'm into sex with strange men but a pick up without the sex (initially) would be nice ha ha. You're right, I am very bored...
Working at the wine sales and I'm just tired that's all
He was good too. Did I tell you he had a cock out to here… and here… with that bit… there.

SMS.15.35. What happened with tickets 2 Bette – Leah

I got up again at 8pm and decided to have a shower. I don’t remember what happened after the shower much, I must have lay down on my bed again.

I got up again at 11pm. I spoke to Mark and watched a Kevin Bacon movie called “Stirring Shadows” with Tom. Rob made an appearance and Aby made an appearance. I went to bed after that at 1.30am.

Saturday, January 29, 2005


Manny was going to the Laird and called to ask me to meet him there. I said I was going to Beyond. He said that’s a shame, but I guess I’ll see you soon. He was going to watch the pool.

Sometime in the evening, I realised that I wouldn’t be going to the party until after Manny had left the Laird, so I decided to go and meet him. Tom called and I said I was going to the Laird to meet Manny.
“Oh yes, that’s a much better idea, Tom said. You go and meet your boyfriend – still sticking with me not going to the party.”
So, I met Manny, we hung out at the Laird and then we drove over to his place and christened his bed in his new apartment.

Tom called me to say he couldn’t find the drugs and money I had left for him, around 1am.

“You’re going early.”
“Yes, I couldn’t sleep. I’ve searched everywhere I can’t find my stuff.” He was sounding a little stressed.
“They are on the hall table, as soon as you walk in the door.”

I got home at 1am, decided against my leather pants until I lose weight, wore black jeans, popped an e and walked into the party. I bumped into Julian as soon as I got there, who took me to where Tom was standing.

“You came. Goodie,” said Tom.

It wasn’t a very friendly party, I don’t think I connected with anyone. Tom said it was all the Sydney queens influence.

For a time at the beginning of the party, I danced with Nick Hill dress only in black jeans – my favourite look on a boy – in which he looked very sexy. His crotch looked very sexy and tight, as his smooth stomach disappeared into it. Coincidently, he walked out of the party at exactly the same time as Tom and I did.

I ditched Tom
and Nick and I went home.

Just for him and me, to trust each other, after knowing each other as friends for so long. He just smiled back at me, when I stole looks of him in the car. He said he couldn’t believe it, what were we doing? Let’s not stop. In the fading light in the afternoon, he undid his jeans, so that the outline of him was visible in his jocks. I rubbed it gently. I could see it as thick, uncut, with a red knob as he pulled the elastic standing straight out. His eyes rolled back in his handsome face, just slightly, as I took him out and rubbed skin to skin. I held his hard cock in my hand as he blew his load.

“I’ve always wanted to do that,” he said. As we lay still in the quiet.

Thursday, January 27, 2005

My view

The bay looks beautiful today. Like glass in places stretching out like silk to larger sections that are ruffled, further out. The Brighton jetty is floating on nothing, suspended in shiny, flat nothing. Williamstown is too, like it is a shiny embryo floating a new. The light is still brittle, the shadows are long, stretching way out to the promise of greater things. The light is golden with the hint of something brighter. There is a cargo ship gliding away, orange sun is reflected brightly on its side, as it slips across the water with no visible means of propulsion.

The sun shines across the city in sideways slants, taking the very tips of the buildings and laying them stretched out on the ground, like shadowy cathedrals, drawn out like animation. It’s like the light has been on in a farther room much longer. The promise of greatness lays there stretched out before me.


The bay now looks like a Monet painting, the boats are lost in the haze of the day; smudgy, fuzzy, hidden in the mist, like a blue veil has been drawn across the sky and the sea. The bay looks like the most beautiful abstract blue cave. You could be lost in it for ever and never fear for your life. Like Mother Nature rubbed her thumb across it, sometime around lunch time. The bay is a great master, changing brush-stroke styles, sometimes on the hour.

Wednesday, January 26, 2005


I was out cleaning the front yard, the path has been covered over with dead hibiscus flowers for… well, ever. I was down on my haunches with a pan and brush. A cute, kind of blonde, kind of scruffy, but with his own style, got out of his car across the road. I first noticed the pants, they hugged him just fine. And when he looked around at me, he was looking intently. He was getting stuff out of his car, but he kept looking over, with burning eyes. Those cream pants showed everything, I reckon he barred up, just half. Open face, wavy hair, kind of. Two day growth. He was hot. He kept staring until he was out of sight, up the lane.

He was on. He was horny.

I had a joint, I was blown away. The garden was beginning to be beautiful, I could see hints of it. I’d swept the path.

I came inside and got a cigarette.

I decided to trim the box-hedge, it had grown so high, as to totally block out the garden behind. My wrist is still sore. I should have had it on my referral for my head scan. Stupid me. I chopped gently, favouring my left hand.

Then I noticed the cute boy across the road again, by his car. I didn’t see him go out there. He was watching me. I reckon he had half a fat, still, as he stood so I could see. He crossed the road again and I kept my eyes on his round crotch. He said hi and kept walking.

I decided, at that point, that the footpath needed a sweep too. It had been ages since it had had a really good clean. The sun was shining, I was getting a bit of sun. It had to be good for me. There were weeds growing out of the cracks at the bottom of the fence. They were unsightly.

A bit later he came out to move his car. He parked in front of the pub, he could see me in the front garden, subtly playing with myself.

“Hi,” he said, from over the fence. “What are you up to?”
“Gardening. Nice day for it.”
“Yeah. I’m in the recording studio. It sure is hot up there.”
“It’s hot out here.”

We smiled at each other, catching each other’s gaze. Nice smile, I thought.

“How many people live here, he said.”
“Just me and my flat-mate. She’s away though.”
“I’m Spiro,” he says.

Nice. Very nice.

“I’m Christian.”

We stood awkwardly for a moment. He blushed and headed back to the studio.
I went inside. My mouth was dry, I needed constant liquid.

I was watching the Australia Day Flag being towed by a helicopter. It was doing laps around the inner suburbs. I was cleaning. I was sweeping the yard, the footpath, I didn’t care. He obviously wanted it, so I decided I would just proposition him, if I saw him again.

Spiro came back from down the street. He sauntered up to me. I was standing on the footpath, I could eye all of him. He asked me what I did. I stumbled something about working for corporate types. He asked who? Not a usual question. I told him. I was a bit stoned, I felt like I was yabbering. I said something about the benefits of working for rich companies.
I asked what he did. He was an artist and a musician.
And I still didn’t tell him that I wrote. Mark told Hillary I wrote plays and she was fascinated and wanted to know if she would have ever seen any.
He had such a nice bulge.

“You look like you’ve got a nice cock,” I said. Just like that, somehow it seemed kind of easy.
“What?” he said.
“You look like you’ve got a nice cock.” He looked down at it. As he did, it bulged out. I like it when guys do that.
“Do you want it sucked?”

Well, it’s true, I’ve been feeling horny lately.
He smiled and kind of absent-mindedly rub at his crotch. I gazed at his bulge. He flushed with lust.

“But, I’ve got work to do and I’ve got a boyfriend.”
“Oh,” I said. “I wouldn’t want you to do anything that would upset your boyfriend.”

He smiled. Gorgeous! He’s just gorgeous.

“I think I know someone, who you know.”
“Steve. He used to be a speech writer for Cliff Campbell. Just someone I knew, knew the guys who lived behind the pub.” He pointed awkwardly at the house.
“It doesn’t ring any bells.”
“Do you live with your partner?”
“No, just a flatmate and she’s not home.”
“It was about four years ago.”
“I did live here with my partner, but it was longer than four years ago.”
“These guys have land somewhere else.”
“Well, yes that’s me then.”
“Steve said he had a threesome with the two guys. Does that ring any bells?” He smiled devilishly.
“Yeah, sure. That could have been me.” But I still had no clue who Steve was. Does that say something about me?

We both laughed and gazed at each other intently.
One problem is that it is about 40 degrees today. Everything is simmering and melting.
I decided I should just come inside, after that. I left the door open, though, despite the heat.

Another j?

I’ve been writing on my computer and going out intermittently to water the garden. The front garden is nearly dead. I was giving it a soaking, until the water began to run. Then I’d come back inside.

I really was mostly at my computer. That was a knock back, it’s tacky to push it now. He knows where to find me if he wants. But the front garden was nearly dead, when I cut back the undergrowth and could see. So I was going out and soaking it, until the water over-flowed and then I’d turn on the tap and let it soak in for a while.

I was watering and saw him go to his car, from the corner of my eye. I didn’t see him walk back, though. And then he headed across the road and sat in the gutter and spoke on his mobile phone, opposite, in full view. He watched avidly as I played with myself, very gently, not out or anything. For a moment I thought that he was distressed. Talking to his boyfriend, telling him he was going to have sex with someone else. Two other people came down the lane, I went inside. I had a piss. I got a drink. I lit a joint and wandered back outside, nonchalantly. He was gone from across the road. I turned the water on. His head appeared over the fence with hungry eyes. He wanted it.

“Come in,” I said.

He came around to the gate, awkwardly, his eyes intent, hungry. He stutter something as he came in the front door and grabbed hold of my crotch, but I didn’t catch it. His cock was hard. It felt good through his pants.

“I really just want a feel,” he said.

He didn’t want any body contact, he said. I think that meant that he hadn’t had sex. Or they were the rules negotiated with the boyfriend. Noble standoff.

“Do you mind if we just have a wank?”
“Sure,” I say.
“Got any porn?”
“Sure, what do you like?”
“What have you got?” He smiled. He’s got a sexy smile.

We went upstairs.
We wanked to porn. He had a beautiful cock. Big. Uncut. Slug…which fell out of his pants. We watched each other wank. He was fucken hot!

“Are you a bottom or a top,” he said?
“Top,” I said. “You?”

I asked him what he liked doing?

“Fucking and rimming,” he said.

I said I love rimming; slide my tongue up his arse.
I asked him if he ever has threesomes.

“Cause the cute Greek guy I’m seeing would love you.”

Every now and again he’d let go of his cock, it would rise up and stand to attention, between his buff-coloured hairy-legs.

“Is he a bottom?”
“Yes,” I said.

I gazed at him. His face was flushed. He looked hot, eyes darting from my face to my cock to the porn and back. He looked like Carey S. He really did look like Carey. Big cock thumping in his hand.

We watched each other.

He asked me if I had rougher porn. When I looked at what I had put on, it was practically a love scene. Stupid me, I thought.

We watched leather guys fucking, in between watching each other.

He said he was going to cum and wanted to know what to do.

“All over”…he looked to the floor.
“Where else are you going to cum?”

He smiled.

I blew. He blew straight after.

He pulled his pants back on and laughed. “I guess I’ll be seeing you,” he said. He said cheers before he walked through the front door.

He was pretty cool. Hot. Masculine.

I wish I’d said Happy Australia Day. But, of course, I didn’t. I was far too stoned. Barely able to communicate, really.

I lay down on my bed at about 6pm and woke up at 11.30pm.

Great way to spend a public holiday.

I got up and called Manny.