I Might Watch Porn

A coffee and a joint and it’s 6am. I woke up, I don’t know why. I don’t normally have trouble sleeping, it’s what I do best, as I’ve said many times before.

It’s my day off, what else are days off for? I ask you? Even if I didn’t go to my mum’s home’s owner’s sixtieth birthday party, oh spoil me, meaning that I really have to go to day. It’s why I take the days off, I remind myself. Stoned at the home, oh the pain. I’ve pulled it off before. Many times. He laughs to himself. The light is brittle at the window.

Morning television, if only you could sell it in pill form. Insomnia would be a thing of the past. Clunk goes the remote control and the screen goes black. The birds are cheeping, well how about that. I wish we had magpies though. The sound of the country morning.

Missy is on the bed purring next to me.

Don’t be a pig, repeats in my ears.

I might watch porn.

9am

My sister calls, she and my sixteen year old niece are heading off to see mum, take her out for lunch. Am I going to be there too?

Isn't it always the way. My lazy day in bed evaporates. Well, I was already feeling guilty. I could have done it, if no one had bought it up, you know.

10am.

Smoke last joint, an hour before I have to leave. Time to clean the house. It's my Monday morning ritual, well, it could be if I, actually, did it every Monday morning. I do most. Half. The intention is always there.

My sister will be a push over, she's known me all my life and is unlikely to notice any difference. She won't be looking. But, my sixteen year old niece, she's always just gunning for evidence of Christian's debauched life style. She's the one who has asked/told me I'm gay, inquisitively, on numerous occasions. I've never, actually, taken up the challenge, but some day I will. You know, I've agreed and stuff, but I've never really talked about it. She's always seemed too young up until this point. She'll notice. I better wear sunglasses.