Blurrrrrr

I was up at 9am to call work to give them the good news. “See you next week, suckers!”

Shane’s last words before he left were, “Now  Guadalupe is coming, don’t throw anything at her.”

At 9.24, I heard the quiet click of the front door and the scuff, scuff, scuff of her feet. “Egads! So early!”

I wasn’t expecting her for another hour, but this was actually good.

I had a shower and went out for breakfast.

I went to Cocos to have breakfast and to get Sam’s jacket, he left there on Sunday. When I got there the first thing the nice lady said to me was, “Just coffee?”

“Um no, breakfast.”
“Sorry, the kitchen doesn’t open until 10.30am, it’s just coffee now.”
And I left.
Without the jacket. I was so surprised about no food, I forgot about the jacket.

Sam would say later, I’m very disappointed, as he does.

So, I went to Arcadia and ate fruit salad and fruit juice. I haven’t drunk coffee since Sunday and not that I have given it up, but I just want to see how long a break I can have from it.
No nicotine since Saturday and no caffeine since Sunday. And I’m feeling fine in those departments. It must be like a distraction thing, give the body bigger things to deal with and it doesn’t notice the small withdrawals. I mean, everybody says that you get a massive head ache from quitting coffee, but no.

I got my hair cut. My stomach was hurting as I walked down Smith Street, but I didn’t want to turn back, I didn’t want to go home, not with  Guadalupe there. I did wonder, momentarily, if I was going to make it there and back again, but I pushed on.

I wonder what the noun for fear of cleaners is?

I bought more Gatorade on the way back. I’m becoming addicted to the stuff. Well, doc said yesterday to keep drinking it.
My stomach was knotting up in pain when I got home and I had head straight to the toilet. Victoria Falls came out my arse. Three times. That is, the entire water flow of Victoria Falls. Three times.
Oh, three times, ten times, I lost count.
Gurgle, gurgle, gurgle, my stomach would sound quite audibly.
A big long fart.
Then squirt. Gush.
Do you remember that greeting card sometime back which had a photo of an elephant pissing on the cover with the caption, It never rains but it pours? That is how it felt.

OMG! It is so exhausting, I can’t begin to tell you. Euthanasia for the terminally ill, you’ve got to be fucking kidding me. If this kept up for much longer, my finger would be hovering over the speed dial to Exit, no problem.

I called Luke and told him about my Niagara moment. He laughed.
I am one for healthy pooh talk. (smile) Just in case you hadn't noticed. And as it turns out, Sam isn't. Quite the baby, shuts any such talk down. Ironic, really, considering what he likes having done to him.
I went to get more Gatorade.

Facebook
I’m so sick, I could hire myself out as a garden manure sprayer... and I wouldn’t need a machine.
Aby wrote
"Nice!
Thanks for that : )"

I went to get Sam’s jacket. And I got more Gatorade.
I wrote my journal for the afternoon.