He Turned Green

It was evil stepdaughter, Miss Jane’s birthday party at the winery in the country. It was a significant birthday milestone, so everyone was going. We’d all been looking forward to it. Her cute ex-boyfriend organised it all for her. Everyone was going, we’d been talking about it for months. We were all to catch a bus at the corner of Smith Street and Victoria Parade, at 10.30 sharp so none of us had to drink.

We got up and we both felt poorly. We both had headaches.

Sebastian and Alex arrived. D and Ashley arrived. Tuli and Shane got ready late in the morning, but were, actually, ready on time.

D told me that Guido has a Bulldog. He has joint custody over it with his ex-partner. I wondered how I never knew that?

Baby Bulldog had a wonderful time, so many people to play with… and legs to hump.

Sam said that he really didn’t think he had such a bad headache that it was making him feel sick.

I said, “Oh come on, we’ll be fine.”

LouLou was late, she got pulled over for a breath test and for speeding.

Sam said again he didn’t feel well and doubted that he was alright to go.

I said to him, this has been planned for months, we said we are going for the numbers, come on you’ll be fine once you get some fresh air into you walking around to the bus.

May and Adrian were in McDonalds when we went looking for an ATM. Sally arrived with her girlfriend.

We were at the bus stop in the glorious sunshine, all gabbling away like old time friends, right on the dot of 10.30 waiting for the magical coach to take us to lovelyland.

I looked over at my handsome boyfriend and he just looked a sickly shade of green. He really did. “Are you alright, babe?”

Through gritted teeth he said, ”The thought of getting on a bus right now makes me feel like I will vomit.”

“Oh.” I touched the side of his face and noticed that all the colour had drained from his lips. “We should go home then.”

“Sorry guys, we can’t go.”