I’d Worn Manny Out, He Was Buggered... Smile

Tom and I went out last night, to the Laird. We did speed and I did the last of my marijuana and we did alcohol. Tom was meeting some of the gaydar boys, Flash, Jet, etc. Nice boys, them seemed. But, I was too smashed by that stage, too blank, too receded back into my own head. I’m a boring bastard, they must have tough I was a boring bastard, as I mutely watched on, incapable. And I am. I’m crap at the small talk thing. I’m too shy, or too slow or too affected…it’s a fuck. I wish I was much better at it.

We came home at midnight. Tom blasted speed and then went to 80.

I woke at 7am, can’t sleep in now-a-days. Bugger! I read the newspaper and ate muesli.

Tom got home at 8.30am. And went to bed.

I went on line with gaydar and got chatting to James T. We spoke on the phone after that for an hour.

At midday I went to get cigarettes. I was hanging, having none but a few rollies that Tom gave me, from late last night.

Jamie said he might pop over later. He’s a gorgeous boy, hot little bottom. He talked about when we first met. In that big three story house, it was like something out of Eyes Wide Shut, something going on in a every room, as I walked past, he said. Dean fucked me for the first time in that house. He was so full on, the bed hit all the walls before I had to tell him to stop. Just too much. I was an innocent boy. They were amazing times.

As much as I’d like to fuck Jamie – he’s such a cute boy – it’s still the flirting I like best. That’s better than him coming over, really.

SMS. 12.17pm. Hello u. Got something 2 tell u which will make u laugh…call me at home when u can – Rachel

Rachel went to the fridge and a bowl slid out and hit her second toe. She lay down and it took ages to stop bleeding. And when she stood up again, it just started bleeding all over again.

She ended up in the Alfred having it operated on. She severed the tendon and had to have it reconnected. She didn’t want a general anaesthetic – I’ve got 4 kids. And she wanted to watch, which stop the entire theatre staff dead in their tracks. Not something people usually wanted to watch. But the mirror was broken when they went to get it.

I hope that’s not significant in the luck department, Rachel said.

She’s off her feet for six weeks.

Manny called. He was going to look at a shop that closes at 4pm with Michael. Then Michael was going to his gym in the city, so Michael would drop Manny off in the city.

He’d be here at 5pm.

We hired Ripley’s Game, don't like John M in the title role. They should have stuck with Matt D. And then we watched some of Mrs Doubtfire. Oh really... ug... Hollywood. I’d worn Manny out, he was buggered. (Not actually literally, although close. Lying naked face down on my bed. Yum, yum.)

I drove him home.

SMS. 11pm. (I was driving Manny home) I’m coming back to your place tonight – Tom