Bryan's Farewell

It was the end of the night, most of the streamers had fallen from the ceiling and were hanging down in random loops. The balloons, which drifted across the room when anyone passed by, were dimpling, like puckered arses. Some girls were still wearing party hats as they headed out the door with their shoes in their hands.

Bryan was hanging by the door, gazing out over the front veranda. The music had stopped, it was just voices now. He’d drunk enough to make himself feel sad at this point, but not enough for him not to care.

The moon was bright in the night sky.

Bryan never had any trouble getting dates on a Saturday night, his mother’s words rang in his ears. The ladies love him. Shrug. Smile. Raised eye brows. And some of the boys, too, she’d say, always with that twinkle in her eyes, like she was being risqué.

The thought made him smile. “Yeah, mum,” he whispered in the departing revellers direction.

A breeze blew in, it was a balmy night outside. Tree branches were like fingers across the face of the moon, Bryan thought of the hand gesture from Pulp Fiction. He leant his head against the door frame and thought about the coming events.

"Hey? Bryan," said a drunken voice behind him.

It was Robbie, suddenly standing next to him, his sister’s ex-boyfriend. He and Robbie had been mates ever since Robbie and Sienna split, much to Sienna’s chagrin.

"You headin OS tomorrow, I hear?" Robbie slurred.

"Yep," said Bryan. "Tomorrow."

"Fuck! Twelve fucken months."

"Twelve fucken months. Yep."

Robbie raised his eye brows. “Are you lookin forward to it?”

Bryan shrugged. He had been looking forward to it up until recently. “Yep.”

Robbie opened his eyes wide, his forehead creased. “Are ya scared?”

Scared? Bryan wasn’t sure. Maybe apprehensive about the unknown, expectedly. He laughed. “Yep.”

Robbie closed one eye, as if he was trying to focus. "Oh man, I know I've had a couple of pills and a skin full of alcohol, but, but..." Robbie threw his arms around Bryan. "I love you man." Robbie hugged Bryan tightly, bear style. Bryan recoiled momentarily, almost overwhelmed, but it felt good being held, embraced. He missed that.

Bryan stroked Robbie's hair, without thinking. "I like you too, mate," Bryan said close to Robbie's ear. Bryan stroked Robbie's neck. His skin was soft. Bryan hugged Robbie tight.

"You need more beer, or what?" slurred Robbie. He turned his head and gazed at Bryan within their embrace, waiting for his response.

"Ha?" said Bryan. He could feel Robbie's breath on his face. "More beer?" he said with a quizzical laugh.

"I only got a 'like.'" Rob did parenthesis on Bryan's back with his fingers. "What's with that?"

Bryan could feel Robbie stroking his back, maybe absentmindedly, as he waited for Bryan's response. He'd be lying if he said he didn't like it. It felt good, being stroked. Touched. It's what he'd been thinking about as he gazed outside, moments earlier.
Robbie laid his head on Bryan's shoulder and nuzzled his neck.

"How many pills did you say you'd had?"

"Enough." Robbie laughed. "To tell you I loved you." He drew Bryan closer in their embrace. “Really love you.”

Holding another person of the same size, build, stature, had always felt good to Bryan. It scared him just a little. It felt equal, real, no pressure to be the alpha male. It didn’t make him feel huge and clumsy, like an oaf walking on egg shells, as it did with a petite woman. Dare he say that it made him feel normal? Bryan stroked Robbie's hair again. "We'll be having to get a room soon..."

Robbie giggled into Bryan's shoulder. "Why can't two guys be in love?"

Bryan rubbed Robbie’s back.

Robbie smelt good, clean and sweet. Bryan figured it was probably just shampoo, but he inhaled anyway. He scrunched his hand in the back of Robbie's hair.

"I love you too, man."

Robbie squirmed in Bryan’s arms.