I So Wanted To Push Her

The first side of Victoria Parade was clear, so I zipped across. With its white concrete surface, I always feel as though I am tippy-toeing across a Pavlova case whenever I cross it. 

I tip-toed across the tram tracks, the gravel between the lines is lethal. The other side, the inbound lane, was full of cars. I walked along the inside row of parked cars, waiting for the traffic to break. 

A woman opened the door to her silver Ford Falcon right into my path. She then did that bend at the knees manoeuvre into the driver’s seat of the car, which only managed to turn her into a great big arse right in my way, and not much else. 

I could see the black tights struggling with the backs of her thighs. I so wanted to push her face first into her car, but I settled for a clear of the throat and a side step around her, as she did tiny little staccato steps towards the steering wheel as if she’d never seen the inside of a car before in her life. 

People shit me, I thought.