I often wondered what was really being said about me, by The Hags, when I was excluded. I knew there would be things said, as The Hags cannot keep their mouths shut. It is impossible for them. Insecurities abound, and huffing and puffing at other people’s candles occurs to build themselves up.
This is, of course, Antony’s interpretation, it is his version of who said what to who. But, it all fits with what I know of...
The Hags have an abnormal, and unjustified, dislike of my Mark, because, essentially, Mark doesn’t like them, so that part of the information rings true. Shane can’t hide it from me, he used to tell me openly, to the point where I was often left wondering if, somehow, he’d forgotten my relationship with Mark?
As far as keeping my friends at arms length, according to reported gossip, maybe that’s true. But who kept who at arms length first?
I don’t count David in that, even if he does have hag status. While David is completely focussed on himself, he does have a lovely warmth and charm as well.
As far as keeping my boyfriend at arms length, Sam just laughed and shook his head and said, “I don’t know why you listen to any of them.”
“The independent thought comment,” is just too laughable and barely worth a comment, other than to say some people follow trends, religiously, never missing a fashion, and some people like interesting and new things.
And the general filth of my house… some days when Sam asked me what the foul waft was in the air, I used to take him to Shane’s bedroom and push the door open. Sam used to wince, as I asked him what he thought it was.
“Oh… I don’t know?” he’d say.
“BO, dirty socks/clothes, smegma, and filthy bed linen.”
I think it is so laughable. I have two of the most anally clean freak friends, Mark and Jill, who would certainly comment. Mark would not stop chastising me for some considerable time, until he broke down and pulled the mops and buckets and vacuum from the cupboard and turned into his mother before my very eyes. Jill would hire a cleaning service, who she would meet at my front door, and she would direct the whole cleaning proceedings. If, indeed, it was as dire as Shane has been telling everybody. Both Jill and Mark have been here very recently. Mark complained about the garden. Jill hasn’t said a word.
I some times wondered if Shane knew how to turn the dishwasher on? Still, I guess, when you grow up with Mr and Mrs Poverty in butt-fuck nowhere, I guess you aren’t blessed with those life skills.
That is what I am going to say to The Hags, anyway – Sebastian, Dante and David. I’m sure they will repeat it, as they are incapable of not gossiping. I’m counting on it.
I told Sam that was what I was going to say to The Hags when they visit and commented on the cleanliness of the place.
“You know they will tell Shane that word for word…”
“I never say anything to anyone that I wouldn’t want them to repeat.”
Oh, I am just venting and I probably won’t say anything. Blah blah, blah, it is good to have some place to vent. Many years ago, I learned that the very best revenge truly is living well. I leant that the best response to all of The Hags self-aggrandising, boredom relieving, bitchiness blab is a dignified silence. If you don't give them a target, they invariably turn on themselves.
It is here I can blurt it out, exorcise myself of it, get it off my chest, and shake the ooze from my tongue. Then I can dust the muck off me and move forward as stately as a galleon.
Perry dropped over yesterday for a catch up. He said that it was nice that Shane had gone to London for a new adventure. “You know that I have always found Shane to be… um… er… hard work.”
This is from Perry who never says a bad word about anyone. It was Perry speak for no liking him.
Sam and I had a late lunch with Tim and Nicholas yesterday, after Perry’s visit.
“Oh what, Shane has moved out. Oh good,” said Tim. He looked genuinely pleased. “I can come and visit now. I’ll come over in the next week, or so, and visit Missy – she was Tim’s cat originally – and I’ll cook you a curry.”
So there you go, I lose a housemate and get all of my friends back.
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