There is peace and quiet, except for the dulcet tones of a bulldog's snore, as I sat here with my laptop at 10am.
It was quiet here today, beautifully so. We’d left the kitchen in a diabolical state last night, there was nobody else to worry about after all, so I popped on some music, rolled up my sleeves and stared to clean. Pretty soon, I realised I was hampered by the overflowing bins which Shane had left me with – the kitchen bin, the outside bin, the front veranda. So, I cleaned all the dishes and was content with that much.
I have to say that I am loving my itunes, running music from my laptop wirelessly to new wireless speakers. It means I can dispose of my bulky sound equipment and space consuming cds. So, I copied the rest of the Labelle CDs into my itunes.
I spoke to Jill for two hours in the afternoon. Bitching. I can’t deny it. It was therapeutic. Cathartic. I wondered if Shane and Tulli’s ears were burning.
It was a sparklingly sunny day. Gorgeous. Gentle. Relaxed. Carefree. The mood in the house was light. No bad vibes, there is only sweetness and light remaining.
Anthony had, rather cryptically, told me there was news about the recently departed that he could only share with me after the problem housemates had left the country. I pumped him last weekend for the information, just in case it really was something I should be aware of before they left, and he told me some story about an apparatus that attaches to the toilet which one sex partner puts himself into head first as the other sex partner licks his arse. Quite frankly, I didn’t believe the story was something that had to be kept secret until borders were cleared, that, quite frankly, just sounded like idle gossip.
Okay Miss, they have left the country, so what was the truthful big news you had to tell me.
Christian
Were you really that stoned on the weekend that you did not hear my story regarding the rimming machine, that was the news. As for the pernicious little bitch with the hyena laugh and her thug, they may be turned back when they arrive at Heathrow. Have you thought about that?
Antony
I heard your story about the rimming machine, don't you worry about that, I just didn't believe that was the big news that could only be shared once they were safely out of the country.
As far as being turned back at the gate at Heathrow, my dear, I care not a whit. I mean to say, that I certainly hope that doesn't happen, for their sake, I hope they have a great adventure. But having said that, let me say this, I have all the keys to my front door back, and Amalgamated Locksmiths have been here today changing the locks, just in case there have been any copies made, so return to Australia ricochet style, if they must, and I am sure they will be happy cohabiting in Kyenton, with Mr and Mrs Dribblepuss.
Christian
This is of course one of the more wise moves you have made. I have nailed a notice onto a tree, Elmer Fudd style, with a photo of Shane and Tulli on it titled "Duck season Open”. This is of course a tradition when a person leaves X street and lasts for 30 days.
I must say that i think this is jointly considered comments some of which you have heard from me already, so i am sure it comes as no surprise that both your and Mark’s relationships are on the cusp of doom especially seeing you have both become so conservative and bitchy. As for the X street kennel and the general filthy state of your house, not to mention the odour, its all now beyond control and it has to now simply be left up to you to sort out on your own. Its also about time you stopped keeping your friends and boyfriend at arms length and start engaging in some independent thought, not just Mark’s input. Of course i must now put down my smoking double barrelled shotgun and cook dinner and i said nothing, i just wrote it.
A(ntony)
What? What are you talking about?
Who said these things? I haven't heard any of them? Oh, do tell. Is it the sad (drug addled) hags, yet again? Is this the talk from those who like to talk? and talk? and talk? and talk? After which, they laugh, which I can only assume they do to make what they are saying seem even moderately interesting?
I am considerably amused by them, don't get me wrong. How deluded some folk are?
Do give me names? I would be tickled to know?
Christian
I have just finished my fish and bok choi dinner and it was splendid. I have decided to leave out breadcrumbs and just dust the fish with plain flour from now on, also to make my own chicken schnitzels and kievs from fresh breast fillets. I just have to buy a small kitchen mallet.
Now, i have no doubt that amused would sum the matter up, i guess if folk get together and talk about you things are not so bad after all. As for sources well you know them and yes it is the hags. I wonder what they say about me, i think im about to find out soon i will let you know. I also strongly suspect that Duck Season will be on in many households for a while. Get lives first, god knows nobody is getting any younger i think.
What are you and the lovely one getting up to this weekend? I have to up early to take Mother for a blood test and then hit Coles.
A(ntony)
Tomorrow, I have a builder coming over to give me a quote to finish the en suit in the top room and to assess the main bathroom to fix the toilet and the tiling once and for all. After that, I am going to investigate carpet for the lounge room. I don't know, I'd really like just to have the plain concrete, but short of polishing it and enduring the dust associated with that, it would mean just the plain concrete.
Then, I am vaguely considering renting out two of the bedrooms via a B&B website, where I can charge $100 a night. Maybe? Apparently, it is very popular. I just have to decide if I want that many people in the house. Right at the moment, I am so over having people living in my house, hugely, that I am going to have to give it some serious thought. But, owning a house in such a premier location, it would mean I could do that and not ever go back to work again.
Sunday morning, I am going to visit me dear old mum. After that I am going out for lunch with Nicholas and Tim.
Sebastian wants to come in the afternoon to pick up Shane's (chipboard) book shelves, saving me from calling 1800 junk, but I'm not really sure what time I will be back from lunch. That rather depends on the strength of Nicholas's dope. Still, I do want to get Shane's shit out of the house as soon as I can, so I can clean up the rooms. Apparently, Sebastian wants me to call him on my way home. Hopefully, I will be in a state where I won't even know how to dial a phone. He he. Big smile. I hope his taxi truck is flexible.
That will only leave the other bookshelf and the appalling white IKEA laminex desk. That is if the council ever comes to collect the mountain of shit that Shane left on the front veranda, as he assured me they would. (How long did he and the prostitute have to clean away Shane's mountain of garbage, one may ask? Too busy being fabulous, no doubt?) Of course, I can't clean any thing up until the bins Shane left literally over flowing onto the ground are collected next Wednesday.
Still, there is no hurry. The days have been glorious, sunny blue skies and a very appealing temperature. So I might just do nothing until March. Why not, I say.
Christian
I think that Mid March would be a good time to make decisions about the b@b, live alone for a while so to speak, and get hold of a couple of visitor parking permits in preparation.
Bye A(ntony)
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