At the wake after the funeral, Julien turned to me and asked, "Have you had sex with any one here? Other than your two boyfriends?"
I laughed and was a bit taken aback. It was not the sort of question I expected to be asked in a house in Carrum.
"No, why?" I asked. "Have you?"
"Yes," replied Julien. "Can you pick which one?"
"You're kidding?"
"No."
I surveyed the room - actually, back yard - there were Simon's brothers, all straight. A splattering of gay boys, friends and ex-boyfriends of Simon's, none of whom, I assumed, Julien had had sex with. All the associated woman, none of who would be included. The crippled grandfather. The one-eyed aunt. The obese cousins. The gaggle of gorgeous nieces and nephews. A few babies. And a group of guys over the other side, all dressed in black suits. There was one with beautiful blue eyes and a soft expression, with an Eddie Munster hair line.
"The guy with the widow's peak," I asked Julien. "Over the other side."
"Bingo," he said. "A long time ago, in the Fitzroy Gardens."
"Are you going to go and say hello to him?"
"No," said Julien.
"Not even for old times sake."
"Um, no."
Mark makes me laugh. Remember, he lives in paradise. On the way home from the funeral, it had got to 4pm by the time we were heading back down the freeway from the outer suburbs to the city. By that time, the other side of the freeway, heading out of the city, was bumper to bumper, all the way from Dandenong back to Hawthorn, practically the entire length of the freeway.
"It is no surprise to me why people are so pissed off now a days," I said. "If they have to sit in that every day."
"It would be the perfect place for a length-of-hose road-side stall," replied Mark.
"What?" I said.
"Well, they could just stop by the edge of the road, attach the hose to the exhaust pipe and end it all," said Mark. "I know I'd want to if I had to put up with that every day."
I laughed. "The world would be better off with less population," I said.
"Maybe, Simon had the right idea."
No comments:
Post a Comment