Saturday, April 27, 2013

Avoiding the Family

I was up at 8am, Buddy was in, I don’t know why. I rolled a joint and smoked it as the coffee brewed, towelling Buddy’s ear while it boiled. Jay came out a little later, and we both sat around the coffee table with our laptops. Jane went to the toilet and then came into the kitchen to wash her hands.

“Look at you two nerds.”

She went back to sleep.

People move about the house. People appear. People go. Many people, so it would seem.

We all sit in the lounge room, not long after, glued to our individual flat screens. Conservative party politics is winning, one has to think. Ultimate conservative political power is mind control, after all. No doubt we’ll be messaging each other in the same room instead of speaking, pretty soon.

The economy is doing well, it is the envy of the rest of the world, an yet Julia isn’t liked. She should be riding a wave of success, practically. And everyone hates her. Well, good luck to them. And good luck to Australia.

Sam and I walk down to Victoria Street, so Sam can have his foot looked at again – I guess, I should say treated – by the bulk billing doctor. At least this time he asked the doc what he thought the problem with the foot, in fact, was, a wart.

I ate pink soup.

How many times have I trudged up that hill with my shopping bags, the number would incalculable


Well , disaster . I had to rush to the loo in Mitcham tday , fortunately one Exeloo was available, Dont city councils realise that ther are good homosexual ratepayers in the community! Why there Exeloos .! However i in the nik of time made it ,but , the fucking button which releases the toilet tissue would not work no matter what i did . So , i thought now what the fuck do i do. So i had my coles bags with me and i thought a Coles receipt would do . The first one was just not enough , so i tore thtough my other bag and found another one which was more substantial ,so all turned out rather well . A(nthony)x.


Oh dear. And with your fat arse too. Christian.


What I meant to say, was surely you mean you used the two supermarket bags and not just the receipts? christian


Buddy got training, Well, quite frankly he has been a bit of a disaster. He needed a pack placement adjustment, clearly he was displaying leader of the pack mentality, at times. Mark started to put Buddy in his place, and he started to respond well. Putting him on his mat and making him stay there. Despite all his bulldoggyness, he picked it up quickly. It was just the reminder I needed to pick up his training again and turn him into the dog everybody loves, and not the dog they all feel a little bored with as soon as they walk in the door. I kind of trained him to a point, he knew to get on his mat. But he just continually turned it into a game and it got tiring night after night, and I unthinkingly stopped doing it. He’s quiet when it is just me and Sam. But when guests come…

Sam picked up the training quickly too. Quietly indicating that Buddy isn’t leader of the pack, that we are. He will take his place on his mat, when told… in fact, he is at the bottom of the pack.

We all practised Cesar Milan’s technique, calm and submissive. (I don’t know? We’ve watched it all on Youtube) We did it all, practically, without saying a word. A direction. A command. Then just insisting that he stayed on his mat, moving back. Mark and Sam used a fffftttt sound. I steered him back, he got it quickly, soon you just had to indicate and he would go back on his own.

It suddenly dawned on me, or was made clear to me, me yelling at Buddy just puts him in a heightened agitated state.

Calm submissive, is what is needed here. He doesn’t try to play. Well, he does, he tires all the tricks, but as long as you keep calm, he stops.

We had him staying on his mat until asked to come off by the end of the afternoon.


Sam has to work this weekend, Saturday night and Sunday night for about an hour. He will have to do it again next weekend. He said he couldn’t go because he had to work. He thought it was rude to take his work with him to Emily’s, even though I assured them they would have internet.

No, it was rude.

And, I guess, you have to psyche yourself up into work mode, which is hard to do at a party. And I am the worst one when it comes to multi tasking, what is that? If I had to work, tune into work even for an hour, I reckon I’d rather be home when I did it.

I didn’t want to go without Sam, sure, I like having my co-conspirator with me at parties, someone to talk to, chat with, laugh at, hang with. But, if that had been the only reason for not going, I probably would have gone, sans San, it would have been too rude not to, after telling Emily I was coming, in person, just a couple of days ago. I didn’t get to see Lissa, with the baby with the cute round face, as Sam says. I was looking forward to the food. Except for the shadow of the show down between Mark and Rob over money. I could just see a tedious three hour fight, cry, sing, fest, discussion stretching into the wee small hours of the morning.

One Waterdale party a week was, after all, was all my duty should have to stretch to these days, after all, exboyfriend. Big smile. No, but… smooth sailing and I would have gone. Stretched out fingers.

So I stayed home too.

We took Buddy for a walk to the supermarket and bought sausages and salad.

Mark and Luke and Jay were home about 10.30pm, as it turned out. They were all clutching McDonald’s bags, complaining that the food was light on. Both Captain Vague and Junior Vague winced when I asked about my glasses, (They were supposed to collect… after much reminding) almost in exactly the same way.

Nothing was said about Rob.

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