“Do you think she’ll look sick when she comes in?” I asked Kirin.
“You mean, do you think she’ll have lost weight?”
“I didn’t say that…”
“But that is what you meant.”
What could I say, that is what I meant.
Kirin laughed.
Fatty Cake Snoop Lady did come in. All in black. (Anna Wintour would be appalled, she hates the all in black look, even on, shall we say, husky girls. It doesn't make you look thin, it just makes you look like a huge black thing) She said she was excited to get back to work. She said she felt much better, thank you. She said she got so bored at home. She said she even tried to do some house work last Friday, but it wore her out. (that was the day, I thought, she was in hospital having kidney problems) Bored at home? House work to relieve the boredom? Oh really? Put down those sugary treats. Get yourself some runners and some thick tights. You know those running pants, maybe it is just me. I want a pair.
I saw her eat her stash of food pretty soon after arriving. Quietly, surreptitiously, as though she’d done all her life. The crinkle of snack food wrappers in the dark. She, actually, never stops eating.
She lasted a few hours and then she declared herself done for the day "I'm not feeling good," she said in her small, girlish voice, that hides her true intensions. She headed home.
I found out the story behind the 8am meeting. Kirin refuses to have a catch up with Paddington Bear, without an independent witness present. Apparently, in the last catch up Paddington was so vile to her (the image doesn't bear thinking about, perhaps I should call him Ted) refuses to go back for another session, without an independent referee. (I should have done the same with the insane Belinda, if only I'd known what the out come of that psychological episode was going to be) It is true, Paddington Bear is trying to get her out, despite his claims to the contrary. So Kirin had to meet with Fran Di Dio, who suggested Kirin take Fat Guts Carol Brady with her. I'm not sure how Fran di di di Dio got involved, you know how HR like to keep out of staff issues, if they can. (Most senior HR staff, from my experience believe their role is to look good in something stylish, Fran is no exception)
“No thanks, she is apart of the problem,” responded Kirin.
“You can take Margie.”
“Yes, okay, Margie would be suitable.”
(Margie, the woman who spent 10K on her child's first birthday party. 10K on a 1 year old? How can you take someone who spends 10K on a 1 year old's birthday seriously)
Kirin did a creepy thing today, however, just to play into everything Mazz said she is. I got to see a side of her I hadn’t seen before. She let her guard down just for a moment. I felt like it was a bonding moment for both of us. I said something about Arthur, that I was sure I’d told him something, that he’d possibly done something different, the long and short of which I could lay blame on him if it went pear shaped. Kirin laughed and when I looked at her, she was smiling a weird smile, the interpretation of which was that I could blame Arthur for anything not done right.
Oh yes, apparently, Happy is unhappy about what happened about me being accused of being rude to her. She is distressed that she caused me to get into trouble. Apparently, Kirin is going to use it against Fatty Cake.
Are you keeping up?
Then this afternoon something happened, just before I was about to leave the office. It was something that Fat Guts Carol Brady had done. There is some thought that Fatty Snoop Cake Lady and Fat Guts Carol Brady are in cahoots. Is Kirin getting paranoid? I think, it was something about an email Fat Guts Carol Brady had sent to Kirin asking her a question about something. Apparently, what Fat Guts Carol Brady had forgotten was to do was to delete the email trail that told the story of some meeting which appeared to be about Kirin.
Suddenly, Kirin asked me if Fat Guts Carol Brady was at her desk? (I can see her, but Kirin can't) I said she was?
“I want to talk to Lacey,” said Kirin. Lacey is a sympathetic HR manager who works for a different division of the company but sits close to us. Kirin wanted Lacey’s expert opinion on what the email said.
“Fat Guts Carol Brady is on the phone,” I said.
Suddenly it was all cloak and dagger stuff, I’m not sure why? Kirin didn’t want Carol Brady to see her talking to Lacey, again, I am not sure why. Kirin and Lacey chat all the time. But, I could see the panic in Kirin’s eye. Kirin waved to get Lacey’s attention, behind the wall out of sight of Fat Guts Carol Brady. Suddenly Kirin was the fifteen year old at the back of the class trying to get her buddies attention without the teacher seeing.
“Tell me if the moll gets off the phone,” said Kirin.
Lacey came over. They read the email together. Kirin pointed out particular pieces. Lacy concentrated on what it said. They both looked serious. Kirin looked extremely nervous. Lacey shook her head. Kirin looked ashen.
I left for home, the drama of the day had been too much for me. It seems to be all consuming at the moment for Kirin. Shake of the head. Too much. It is exhausting.
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