“Carl’s life insurance will pay for the fit out,” says Lillian.
“You’ve got get some breaks with early onset Alzheimer’s?” says Lillian.
“You’d think,” says Amy.
“It is still amazing that Carl and Denis got it at the same time…” says Lillian.
“And both our husbands so early,” says Amy. She sighs wistfully.
“I still hope it wasn’t those Gold Seal aluminium saucepans from China we both got for engagement present,” says Lillian. “I still wonder if they had anything to do with it?”
“I still use mine,” says Amy.”
“Still going strong at my place,” says Lillian. “Except for the one piece that Lachlan put in the dishwasher that time, but other than that replacement, nothing.”
“Nothing wrong with us,” the two women carol together. They both laugh.
Lachlan is standing with the plans.
“I tell you mum,” says Lachlan. “Go to Bali for two weeks and I’ll get this done for you, I have four weeks leave.”
“You’ll do it?” asks Lillian questioningly.
“All the costs are covered, budgets are done, the builder has been contracted, it’ll be fun,” says Lachlan. “Mum, that is the least I can do.”
“You’re a doll,” says Lillian. She grabs her strapping son and gives him a kiss on the forehead. Lachlan squirms from her grip.
2 weeks later…
Lillian is standing in the middle of the newly fitted out shop. There is a knock at the door. Amy comes in gushing.
“Oh, I don’t believe it, I don’t believe it, I don’t believe it.”
“You better believe it,” says Lillian.
“Good old Lachlan.”
“Did it in his spare time.”
There is another knock at the door. Lillian’s lawyer son, Damien, is at the door.
“I’m double parked, here I’ve got things for you to sign.”
“What things to sign,” says Lillian.
“The purchase of the shop…”
“We bought the shop?” questions Lillian.
“Lachlan did the numbers, he ran them by me, and we both saw that you are much better to purchase this place out right,” says Damien. “Didn’t Lachlan explain it to you?”
“No, dear?”
“Damn,” says Damien.
“Explain what?”
The mortgages on this and Gold Street, the shares we sold, didn’t he explain any of it?”
“No, dear, not a word.”
“Damn him to hell…”
“What shady business are you two up to, to damn your brother to hell…”
“Er… what?” says Damien. “I didn’t literally damn him to hell.”
“That is what I heard,” says Lillian.
“Me too,” Amy chimes in.
“Jesus they come in twos,” says Damien. He looked from his mother to Amy and back to his mother.
“I am not at all sure what you mean,” says Lillian. “If you and your brother have been up to something dodgy again…”
“Dodgy, my arse,” says Damien.
“Well, it’s not me who nearly got done for insider trading…”
“Yes, yes, I know, Dad knew the judge,” says Damien. “Or you slept with him…”
“That is still no joking matter, Damien,” says Lillian. “Your brother nearly went to jail.”
“Well, there’s nothing dodgy here.” Damien lays the papers down in front of the two women. “We are just setting up the most cost effective way to proceed with this… um… er… madness. Now sign here, here, and here.”
“Should I have my lawyer look over it first,” says Lillian. She laughs as if it were very funny.
“Your lawyer prepared the documents, so quit with the jokes and sign.”
“My darling,” says Lillian. “I had no idea I was still able to get you to talk through gritted teeth.
Lillian signs.
Damien pushes the documents towards Amy. He offers her the pen. He looks at the papers and then back at Amy, when she doesn’t react, he says, “You too.”
“Who dear, me dear, no dear.”
“Yes you too.” Damien exhales loudly. He proceeds through gritted teeth. “I’m double parked and I have to be somewhere else ten minutes ago, just sign the fucking paper.”
“Damien,” Lillian chastises.
“I’m going to kill Lachlan. He was supposed to explain it to you two, I was supposed to process the paper work. Easy. Again, I am left doing all of the fucking work.”
“Why do I have to sign?” says Amy.
“You own half of it all, the café, the building, the mortgage, the coming nightmare. 50 50. So sign the damn paper, will you?”
“You want something done,” says Lillian. “Ask a busy man.”
Whorl wind Damien packs everything up immediately it is all signed. He stuffs all of the paperwork in his brief case. “Nice doing work with you… ladies.” He storms out of the shop.
Amy and Lillian are left alone in the newly renovated shop.
“Now what do we do?” says Amy.
“You just need a good cheese cake recipe,” says Lillian. They’ll come for blocks for a slice of good cheese cake.”
“Oh Lillian, if only it was that simple.”
“Oh, darling, it is,” says Lillian. “May I introduce my sour cream cheese cake?” Lillian produces a large, plain white cheese cake from under the counter.
A handsome young man comes through from the back and man’s the coffee machine.
“Darling,” says Lillian. “This is Hulio, he’s our new barista.”
“How do you do,” says the handsome boy with a perfect Spanish accent.
“Hoik a couple of slices of that onto a couple of plates, will you darling,” says Lillian. “And a couple of coffees and you’ll be just about perfect.”
“Yes mam.”
Lillian twitches her nose at Hulio.
Amy’s phone rings. “It’s Leah,” says Amy.
“There must be a fire somewhere,” says Lillian. “Or a camera crew.”
Amy waves her hand in the air as if to tell Lillian to stop it. “Yes, good darling,” says Amy. “How’s Sydney? Yes, I’m listening… I don’t understand… to who’s needs? … Oh. Really. How will they get here from Sydney…. Oh.” Amy makes big lips. “Well, if you are sure… Oh, you are sure. Well, I don’t know what to say. Okay… um.” Amy turns to Lillian. “Leah is sending us 3 waiters excess to her corporation’s needs.”
“I don’t understand?” says Lillian.
“Apparently, Leah’s corporation has waiters, 3 of which they don’t need. And the 3 girls are happy to work here and get paid by Leah.”
“Is that even legal, darling?” asks Lillian.
“Good point, darling. I have no idea.”
“I have organised the food supplies,” says Simon. “Gobbo the chef will be coming Monday morning…”
Blake laughs behind Simon.
Simon holds his finger up at Blake. “It’s just going to be a soft opening, no big fanfare, no big announcement, you all have to learn your craft.”
“That we do,” says Lillian
“All you have to do is run it,” says Simon.
“Any ideas,” asks Lillian.
Amy gulps.
Simon snaps his large size diary shut. “Come come, I’ll have none of that talk, it’s all go go go now.” Simon air kisses both of the women and leaves the shop. He stops at the door. “Have you finalised the name?”
“Sour Cream,” Lillian says triumphantly.
“You’ll get all the lesbians in here,” says Simon.
“Really darling,” says Amy.
“Sour Cream,” Simon repeats.
“It is supposed to be ironic,” offers Lillian.
“You don’t want them thinking about their wastes lines as they come in the door,” says Simon.
“It is the house specialty cream cake.”
“Sure, why not,” says Simon. He flaps his hands. “Its esoteric.”
He exits through the front door, followed closely by Blake.
It is quiet, Amy and Lillian are alone for the first time. Lillian walks the length of the café, running her hand along the counter. She turns and looks back at Amy. “How soon before we can offload this joint.”
“We’ll have to humour them for a little while,” says Amy.
“This is a lot of work,” says Lillian. “Lesbos. 1982.”
“Oh, the sun and the sand.”
“Maria,” says Lillian. “I wonder whatever happened to Maria?”
“How hard can it be?” Amy looks around the café.
“We’ll have to find a patsy, darl, some poor bitch who is down on her luck and who needs…” Lillian sighs. “All of this.”
“But the children worked so hard.”
“I’m sure the boys just did it to spite me,” says Lillian. “When have they ever listened to me in the past?”
“Shannon is playing guitar Saturday Night.”
“So that is the three of them, a hat trick of my sons,” says Lillian. “Every last one of them, stabbing their mother in the bosom.”
“That’s it,” exclaims Amy. “My Jemma and your Shannon could run this joint. They only run their own business’ part time, let’s face it.” Both the women laugh.
“Advertising company,” questions Lillian. “That’s bullshit the world doesn’t need.”
“Personal trainer?” questions Amy. “I’m sure that is just so you can perve on the opposite sex in something skimpy.”
“Do you think that is wise?” questions Lillian.
“They have the time,” says Amy. “They could do it.”
“But those two find time for other things.”
“You son is a feral pig,” says Amy.
“What does that make your daughter,” says Lillian. “A pig fucker?”
“They underutilise their time, it is time their mother’s step in,” says Amy. “As for that other business, if it fits, it fits. What do I care?”
Brilliant,” says Lillian. “They could, we must get to work on it immediately.”
“It is a gift from their mothers,” says Amy.
“It is an amazing opportunity,” says Lillian.
No comments:
Post a Comment