Oh my Gard! (said in an annoying American accent) my first morning since David has moved out. It is so nice to have the house to myself. Morning solitude, it's bliss. Shane's at work. Peace and quiet.
No David demanding my attention. Look at me, look at me, look at me. No David telling me what he's doing. This fabulous thing and that fabulous thing. No David wanting to chat. What are you doing? Am I anoying you? No David telling me his life story first up. Now back to me, back to me. No David putting the TV on to eat his breakfast, and then leaving it blaring when he goes back to his room. No David crashing about. No David talking on his phone. No David putting Tibetan fucking monk chants on loud, crashing symbols, chanting, going OM, lighting incense to appease the gods, spirits, spooks, the eternal, higher power, universal life force.
I'm the only one who is going to be home during the day. Yay! I'm not going to live with a non-nine to fiver again, I want it to myself. Not that I am looking for anyone to move in. David worked nights and weekends, so he was always home during the day.
Everything just feels so different. How do I explain it? Peace and quiet and I know it's all mine, all day - of course, I have to go see my mum - to enjoy. The world seems like mine, which it's not going to be interupted any time soon.
I told Beck and Mark that it still felt like a failure, of sorts. You know, David and I have known each other for a long time... They both told me that I was soft... almost with exactly the same tone, roll of the eyes and tut of the tongue.
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