"What? What? Really? NO!"

I was smoking on my balcony from an early hour. Lovely. I mean it was light, I wasn't up before the dawn, or anything, sneaking them in. The sun was hot, even at 7am. Bright. New. I felt like a toasted muffin sitting up there. I could feel the rays of the new sun hot on the skin on my face

It’s a beautiful, sunny, crisp day. Perfect. It sparkled. Coffee as I gazed out the back at the light, lifted me to greet it all.

Anthony called, his daily call, saying he’d sent me an email, had I read it? Of course, he was having trouble with his computer and didn’t know if he'd sent it, or not. I pretty much got simultaneously with the phone call.

“So what’s up?”
“Read the email."
The printing on the email seemed small and the words many.
"You tell me."
"Oh, okay. You can't read the email?"
"No."
"Well..."
"What? What? Really? NO!"

Subject: Er
Well after taking out the bins i tripped again, this time more serously, i could not get up and a kind neighbour helped me stand. I was concussed and seriously injured, i have seriously broken my left collar bone this time and broken 3 ribs, i must have lain on the concrete for 20 mins. After attempting to ignore it i woke Aileen up and said i am in big trouble She called 000 as i had blood running down my face, and was sure of other damage. I was rushed to the hospital ER and admitted immediately. The first x-ray showed a major break in my collar bone, then i was placed in short stay and fitted with a neck brace for a ct scan after 2 hours all was fine, then a rib x-ray. I had to have pure morphine for that one and it still hurt. Back to my bed in short term stay. Yes i was given Morphine, it was hell. THe next day i had to stay overnight on lots of meds. 
I woke up this morning with screams from hell its self, i had not really slept, i heard that a derenged senior citizen had eaten the hand off an old woman. It is all confirmed by the 50 people arriving, including the Victoria Police.  I will never forget it, my roomwas next to the sun room where it all happened! Ted Balliue say no harm is being done, but seeing there was no bed for me, i was sent home, with a case of MOrphine, which i am taking with a drop of wine. My lounge room is now full of nubile young boys, from the Black forest in Bavaria, all stark naked, and if Aileen was not sitting here i would do something about it. Thanks to the LIbs in Victoria.

Pissed again! I couldn’t believe it. You can’t be serious?
“So, what do I do now?” asked Anthony. “How do I get my simple groceries and pay my bills?”
“I don’t know.” And I didn’t know. Fuck me! Two busted arms? Even if the first broken collar bone should be healed now.
“It’s probably best that I don’t think about it today.”
“Yes.” That was the best I could do. Yes. Two broken collarbones, be one of them just about healed. It was beyond my expertise.
“I wash the morphine down with wine and all the pain goes away.”
"What's with the boys in Lederhausen in your room?"
"I think the morphine is making me hallucinate."

I stopped myself saying, well, you’ll have to get a carer and you’ll have to get them to do everything for you. Anthony’s has worked in that profession himself, he should know about the help that is available to him.

I was lost in the day, it was slipping by just fine. I was so in a not-to-be-disturbed mood. Sam asked if he was coming over. “Is David still coming over to watch Project Runway?
“I don’t know,” I told him.
I vaguely remembered something about it, last week, David spoke about it. I hadn’t heard anything since. I was secretly hoping that nobody remembered, as I was happy with my stoner existence, in the quiet. Pathetic, I know. It was just nice to just laze and not think of anything.
I don’t feel like doing anything, to tell you the truth. I text Sam.
I see.

Eventually, Shane called to say that David was coming over for Project Runway and that Sebastian and Nick, were coming too and that Sebastian is cooking. Was Sam coming over for Project Runway?

Sebastian cooked Pesto Pasta twirls and made a salad.

At one stage there was a loud crash in the kitchen, during the cooking process. Shane get’s up to investigate.
“What happened, dohl?”
“Oh, I just smashed that chipped dinner plate of yours that I have always hated.”
“Oh?”
Whatever. Good for you. Really, Sebastian. Is that even normal behaviour?

When Sam arrived he said that I didn’t want to see him. I guess, he was right in some sense. But, it’s not like I’d ever say that I didn’t want to see him. I just didn’t want to see anybody.
I was happy smoking pot entertaining myself, that’s what I was saying. It’s true.
He gave me a look.

Mark called and said he’d half “carched” (high pressure water hose) the house and it looked lovely. Of course you have, action man, with a whole new project in front of him.

Maybe, I need a new project in my life. I laugh, which turns into a cough. (one of those meet-a-healthy-version-of-yourself came on the TV as I wrote that)