Head shake. Think about it later.
That night, I was in Coles and they had Fiddle-Leaf figs for $20. As I walked past, I thought, I could get Tony one of those. His office is a jungle of plants. And I did. Job done.
Then I had to wrap the thing and get it under the office tree without anyone noticing. I opted for a Xmas bag. How else do you wrap a plant? So, the plant wasn’t completely covered up and if anyone saw me they’d know what I’d bought and for who. The point of Kriss Kringle… oh, what is the point of Kriss Kringle?
I was anxious about the whole thing. Carrying it to work. Getting in early enough not to be seen. Getting in early enough before Tony, as he is usually in quite early, even if I am usually in before him.
I was anxious all the way to work. (Anxiety is the most common mental health issue today, apparently. Why are we all so anxious?)
I never got anxious as a kid, it was a time of endless summer days and freedom and fun. But now, I recognise the anxiety I feel at certain times, like getting my poorly wrapped Kriss Kringle present under the Xmas tree at work without anyone seeing.
Life has taught me anxiety. Life has taught me that bad things can happen. That cunts exist. Not everyone plays fair. Sometimes you have to bite and scratch, not matter how foreign that feels to you, just to maintain what you have.
Bad things happen to good people.
But, I did get the present under the tree without anyone seeing me. Only the nuffy one was in, and she wasn’t paying any notice to what I was doing. So, my judgment about the Xmas bag was sound, why the hell was I worried about it?
Declan played Xmas elf, which he took very seriously, so much so that more than one person said he was the grumpiest (little) elf they’d ever seen. I thought he looked adorable in the hat, smile, or no smile. (I picture him in his undies and he seems even sweeter)
No comments:
Post a Comment