You Are Soon to be Banned from Smoking. Guido will be Notified.

Tom

Morning miss. How goes ya on this, somewhat, overcast Saturday morn?

I’m off to see my mum. She’s got a swollen jaw, she says it’s from a virus.

“Some wretched woman sneezed all over me in the tram!”

She said her throat was so bad, at the beginning, that she could hardly swallow and she was dribbling. She said it took a whole day of gargling salt and water to make it come good. She now says that the skin has peeled off her chest, she thinks from the night sweats.

“It will be lovely see you tomorrow,” she said. “It’s kind of lonely when you are old and sick.”

christian

8am and here I am awake and coffee and joint in hand.

Fuck! 9.30 and I’m stoned off my bounce. I’ve got to go to mum’s, now. So I went and got coffee and milk. I saw Spiro on the way, he looked so cute, his pants were well filled out, let me tell you.

I did my shopping with mum. She is getting more and more forgetful. It’s funny how she has become Auntie Ida, twenty years later. Now I’m home.

SMS. 12.12. I want to visit u a bit later? – christian

SMS. 12.55. Ok – Guido

I called around at Guido’s, but he was out shopping. He said he’d call me when he got home around 3pm.

SMS. 13.58. (Guido) R u home mate? – christian

You're a good son Christian.

You are soon to be banned from smoking by the way.

Tom

Banned from smoking?

christian

Mark called to see how I got on with my mum.

Guido dropped in the dope around four.

yes!

from smoking!

Tom

Why?

christian

Look who's talking.

christian

Hey Miss.

After dinner with my "drama queen" family, I'm off to Ron's, then shall pop into my gentle middle floor room to sleep the night away.

I'm off to the footy tomorrow!

And how are you, oh grumpy one?

How's ya mother?

Not being a drama queen I hope, I know how that upsets you!!

J Tom

Cuz yer smokin too much pot miss, and not remembering a word anyone (me) says to you.

Tom

It’s for you own good I tells ya.

Guido will be alerted shortly.

After the intervention of course!

Tom

Miss.

Are you able to get in?

I can't, and I'm wondering if they are onto me for having two profiles!

Could you please check?

xT

Two profiles, luv, isn't that frowned upon?

Christian

yes

but i wanted a non-openly-hiv poz one

dont dob on me

Tom

I know I was a little sour there for a while, but I wouldn't dob ya in luv!

christian

I had phone sex with Manny, we blew over the phone to each other. It’s his sexy, husky voice that I can wank to.

Aby’s gone to machine Gun Felatio, I’m smashed on the couch on acid and dope, watching Arlington Road.

I think Tom’s going to turn up.