First Day Back

I slept in a little, smoked cigarettes on my balcony and generally wafted into work, knowing that Beck wasn't going to be in until later in the day, but I still got there at 9.03. I even let an 86 go by so I could go to the newsagent to pay a bill. The secret is not to just stand there and wait for the next 86, the secret is to walk to Nicholson Street so as to be able to catch a 96 as well as an 86.

Busy tram, bug-eyed woman standing in front of the ticket machine, who moved an inch for me, as is usually the case. Pest, I thought. She looked a bit downy to me, but maybe it was just the unfortunate eyes – mouse hair, plain looks, dumb expression. Anyway, as I was mentally chastising her, I spied a vacant seat through the crowd and forgot her instantly, slid through the crowd in one movement and sat down.

As I got myself settled, I spotted through the crowd a handsome Asian boy, 6 foot, athletic, with thick sunnies on and the ubiquitous hand, in his pants, snugly fitted, fingers curled under, nice knuckles. Nice light grey pants fitting him well. Gotta love a boy in pale grey pants. He looked like he was on the pump in those pants, jutting out in profile, right in my line of vision. I imagined the black sweatiness, even if it was early in the day.

The tram was a little crowded so I gazed freely (I gaze freely, crowded or not) He looked over in my direction and then, as the crowd thinned, he walked over to me and stood in front of me, just on the other side of the door barrier. He looked straight at me (as straight as I could tell in sunnies) as if he knew, facing me so I could continue to gaze. Nicely fitted pants, I thought. He stood facing me, glancing at me as if to check if I was still looking. I was, through the gap in the door screen. Nice, I thought. It’s funny – and I could be imagining this, granted, but it happens often – how some guys tend to face me and not look away when I am on the morning gaze. He was gorgeous; black hair, olive skin, handsome face, nice hand in his strides.

I looked out the window and watched Bourke Street flash by. I much prefer the low rider trams, with the pedestrians at the same level, it seems cosier.

I need to get a man... or new porn in my life, I thought.