Contemplation

The lovely Sebastian

Monday Monday

What a lovely day, what glorious weather for us little Melbournites. Lovely! I should get my bike out and ride my fat arse around the Yarra for an hour. I should. I know I should.

I have new photos to scan, though. I went up to Bolago and went through their photos. They weren't the photos I was looking for, but they are good none the less. He he.

I don't know where the missing photos are? It's a mystery. I still reckon I leant them to someone who wanted to do a collage, or a significant birthday album for someone. Moral of the story, don't be so nice to people.

Ha, ha. 

The Boats

Kim, my step son, Fenn, and my good mate Fergus cruising the Yarra

The Boats Picture

Kim, my step son, Fenn, and my good mate Fergus cruising the Yarra in Perry's boat

Day 6 of Quitting Smoking

And as it turns out, I should have staid in bed, yesterday. No, really. 

Everybody was giving me the shits! Big time. I've got three people staying and when I found out that their work had been cancelled today due to the rain, I wanted to kill them. Well? I herumphed.

I yelled at Mark and slammed the phone down on him. 

And when I found myself yelling at Sam and thinking he was a shit... I suddenly stopped myself and thought, Oooohhhhhh... maybe I'm the common denominator here. Then I just had to think, day 6 of quitting smoking. 

Hmmmmm. 

It could be me.

David has always said I was horrible and I've always denied it. Of course, he is wrong and I am right, normally, and David should never read this, as I have given up smoking when he lived with me many times and he didn't even notice, however... there are those occasions when I am a monster and he is right... and this could be one of those occasions.

So, I kissed and made up with Mark and ran away to the country. It's lovely up here, the sun is shining and the birds are singing.

Boys Will Be Boys

Still In Bed Listening To The Rain

 it's not that early, I realise, as I glance over at the clock. I'm usually up around 9am, it's a good time to start the day. It's not 9 am yet, I'm so comfortable. I'm still in bed, I haven't got up yet, I'm still wrapped in my doona, listening to the rain. It helps make sense of the world, it makes the day better, that gentle calm before the day begins. Stretch. Yawn.

Oh, I've got so lazy, I can't ever see myself working again. Can you retire halfway through your life? That's what I've been telling everyone, when they ask, that I have retired. I'm so sick of the, "Have you got a job yet?" question. It shuts them up, if only momentarily. Someone replied to me, "But you must have twenty years of work to go?"

I wanted to go up the Westgate and jump, at that thought.

Wind Surfing in Rarotonga

My Exboyfriend's Nipple Ring

Lauri

My dog

Boy Soup San Francisco

Cleanerphobia

I had to get out of the house yesterday morning, as the cleaner was due, it was Wednesday, after all. Shiver!

Is there really no "home" or "end" key on an Apple keyboard? For goodness sakes.

... but, I digress

Shane had just left the house for work, bang went the door, so I knew it was sometime after 9am and probably not yet 9.30, although it could be close. I stumbled out of my room and down the stairs to answer the phone. I'm not sure why? Still on half-sleep auto pilot, I suspect, way too soon out of the crypt for my cynical, fuck that, gene to have kicked in yet. The (new) nursing home has been calling me daily about one thing or another. Monday it was for the name of Lottie's old doctor, despite the fact that I had given it all to them in writing when I admitted her. Tuesday, it was to tell me that she has shingles, which may explain Monday's call. And yesterday it was about some pharmaceutical requirements. Did I want to buy them? Or did I want them to purchase them? Really? What do you think?

I staggered away from the phone, spied the coffee grinder, lurched towards the cupboard to select a glass for a drink of water, when I heard, "'ello." 

I tensed, grimaced, still with my back towards the kitchen door, spammed, as thought I was Doctor Jekyll turning into Mr Hyde, avoided the Seinfeld'esque intake of air and the wail of "Newman," except in this case it would be "Guadalupe, instead turning and quietly saying, "Good morning," sweetly instead.

I slammed those beans into the machine and ground the shit out of them. I intensely urging the coffee pot to boil faster, come on, come on, come on, as the gas burner licked around the bottom of the aluminium pot. "Come on!" The gwoob, gwoob, gwoob, gwoob, shhhhhhhh, shhhhhhh, shhhhhh, crcrcrcrcrcrcrcrcrcrcr, could not come soon enough. "Fuck you universe about watched pots!" Hands as fists. Get me out of here, I thought, as the vacuum sprung into life.

I showered, dressed and was out the front door in record time.

I had bills to pay, credit card, phone, gas, all a day, or two late. Oh really, what time have I had? Smith Street was bathed in sunlight and a gentle breeze blew.

I went and sat out the front at Kent Street, simply because it was across the road from the post office and I had never been there before, it was always a little too cool for school and it had an outside, smoking area. I wasn’t at all sure if it served food. I wasn’t sure if it was simply a bar, but at 10am in the morning, I thought it can’t just be a bar open at this time. I was feeling a little hungry by this stage and in need of some food and it was nice just to sit. And sit. And sit. And sit. The man next to me was brought his coffee, after which the serving person slipped away like the wind. I didn’t really care it was just nice to sit, after my hurried exit from home. And sit, and sit, and sit.

I looked over at the guy sitting next to me and he was drinking a beer with his coffee. Maybe, it is just a bar?

Maybe you had to go in and order. But surly, they would come and tell me. Surly, they weren’t too cool for communication? But, apparently, they were.

Oh, I should go in. I got up to go see what was what, when I though, actually, I could just leave. And I headed to Rosamond.

I had just been served my breakfast when Sam messaged me and asked if I wanted to have lunch with him. Sure, why not. I’ll be finished breakfast in a read of The Age’worth and I can head right in.

Mark rang a short time after that to tell me about his latest venture in Hanoi 

“Where are you?” he asked.

“I’m in Rosamond having breakfast. I had to leave the house as the cleaner is here.”

“Nice,” he said.

“When will you be down, Sam wants to show you the air?”

“Friday night, can you tell him for me?”

“Sure, I’m having lunch with him after this.”

There was momentary silence on the other end of the phone.

“You are having lunch with him… today?”

“Yes.”

Then there was laughing on the other end of the phone.

“Let me get this right,” said Mark. “The life of the unemployed… you have left the house because the cleaner is cleaning your house, to have breakfast… after which you are going straight to lunch in the city?”

“Correct.”

There was more laughing.

Just rude, I thought. 

“What do you want me to do, get a drug habit and burgle houses?”

“Oh Chriso, only you…”

“What?”

“Aren’t you worried about getting a job?”

“I laugh at your propose sentence into servitude.”

“Well, as long as your sense of self worth doesn’t take a battering.”

“What? As opposed to going back into the corporate world to have my life sucked from me by the self-focuses bunch of blood suckers who frequent the hallowed halls of big business?”

Sam was more horrified that I'd, actually, ordered muesli for breakfast when I could have chosen anything I wanted.

"Muesli," he said with disdain. "So original."

Rush Boys

All the Rush boys are hot. I'd sleep with any of them, all of them. Do you think there is a gay guy in its casting? Or are we just lucky with the times we live in. Whichever, not since Wildside...

There You Go....

Sam found my blog, the first person ever to know about my blog, other than me. Actually, my good friend Panda is... was... the only person who knew my blog belongs to me. She and I studied writing together.

Hello to Panda, if you are reading.

I've got a new lap-top, an Apple... Sam bought himself a new Air and I now have his Pro. I was pissing around on my PC and the lap-top and the lap-top ran out of battery while I was away from it. I didn't think anything about it and continued doing stuff on my PC. That's how things go, you know, so I just closed the lid. (Is it called a lid?)

Sam came over sometime later and he plugged the lap-top in and fired it up to commence my instruction on all things Apple... when... can you guess, up came my blog in front of the two of us sitting looking at the screen.

Whoosh! There is was. Ah! NO!

I panicked... well, panicked is a little strong, to tell you the truth. But, I wasn't expecting it, I was caught completely off-guard. I tried to be clever and I tried to open something else. I tried to open the news to show him something, but there was nothing... nothing I could allude to as something of interest.

And the heading of the first entry in my blog was, It's my birthday. I was sure he would want to look at what I had been looking at online, it was just unfortunate that it was so obviously about me.

Each time I steered him away from it, he managed to come back to it... until finally I grabbed him in a bear hug and said, "I really don't want you to read that."

"Really," he said. "Is that you?"

We wrestled.

I don't, actually, mind Sam reading my blog, in fact, I kind of like the idea of someone reading it... except, that there is certain freedom in not having to answer to anybody about what I write.

I guess, it is hello to Sam, if he is reading. (That seems weird)

But, Shane and Sebastian were at my place and I certainly didn't want Sam blurting it out and everybody knowing about it, as they are all in it, of course. I think if that was the case, I'd have to stop writing it all together.

Not that I've been too diligent about writing lately.

Truthfully, the idea that Sam knows about it has stopped me writing for the last week... just while I thought about it. I tentatively brought up the subject with him, but he didn't realise what I was talking about and I dropped it quickly.

Or... at least... honest truthfully... Sam gave me a photographic scanner for my birthday and I have been more interested in scanning all my old photos than writing anything.

Stay tuned for a pictorial wonder... ha, ha... wander through my past

 

Holy Cock

Can you imagine sucking Jesus' cock? Do you think it would taste like angel hair pasta or heavenly sherbet?

Equality for All

Presumed heterosexual until proven otherwise, still true today. Of the whole world, really.

You know, it just kills me when the biggots, the homophobes and those with religion use the idea that we want special rights when we are asking for equality, don't they get that we will never be equal, no matter how many wins we have, no matter how many rights we get.

They just don't understand how we will always have to live in a heterosexual world, considered by most to be second class citizens.

Driven To Church On Sundays By A Little Old Lady

Men Have Been Programmed To Be Unfaithful

All men have been programmed to be unfaithful, we forget that. They evolved to spread their seed around as many females as possible, to continue the healthy procreation of the species. That is what the male was preprogrammed to do. Woman's groups conveniently forget that fact. 

2011

Except, I don't think I ever was. I've been faithful to all my partners, even those with whom I have had open relationships, as open relationships come with negotiated rules, and I have always been faithful to those agreements.

2023

Clowning Around

The size of your feet being a ratio to the size of your penis, was a rumour started by clowns.

 

The Eldest Son of Dr & Dr Lau Gave Online Grooming Tips To Boys With No Clue