Rather Be Dead Than Fat

Tom was home when I got home. He bought pot over and we smoked.

He said that the anti-rejection drugs that he’ll have to take if he is given donor bone marrow will make him fat. He says he is not going to spend the rest of his life fat.

Aby said that Tom had told her that he had a 1 in 3 chance of surviving. I just couldn’t deal with it with him. I need to feel 100 per cent strong and with-it and together and I’m just not at the moment. Even when he told me about rather being dead than fat, I, practically, told him I’d heard it all before. He deserves way more support than that, even if that particular statement, really, has no response.

It must be really awful, the position he is in. None of us have ever been in a situation even remotely like it. So unfair. Such a hard thing to have to go through, especially when you have fought it once and won.

I can’t be chicken. I have to be strong.