Merry-Go-Round

Manny called me at the office, first thing, just as I was in a meeting with two colleagues. I'm not sure why I took the call, except to say I rarely let one of his calls go unanswered.

"I'm still in bed... in my boxers... I've got the hardest cock."

My two female companions are gazing back at me. I swing my chair around and hush my voice.

"Ha, ha, ha. Good morning sunshine. This is early for you, isn't it."

"I know." (Little Britain style)

Manny's exboyfriend Stuart has just broken up with his boyfriend, Angelo. So Stuart has been hanging out at Manny's - quite out of the blue.

"You should see the body on him, says Manny. "He's 75 kilos."

75 kilos, Manny's holly grail.

Stuart was also Julien's boy friend, when Julien lived with me, so Stuart hung out here for a while.

Stuart is hot. He smolders. Buzz cut. Amazing, big, intense, blue eyes. A sly smile. He and Manny were gym buddies, when they went out together. Apparently, sex is what Stuart does best. Both the faces on Manny and Julien stood a testament to his magnetisim, when Stuart and sex were mentioned in the same breath.

Stuart's handsome face kept flashing into my mind all day. He really is a gorgeous boy. He'd been a limosine driver, tellimarketer and kept boy, in the time that I've known him.

Manny called me back, early evening, early for him. 7.30pm. He was slurring.

"Have you taken valium?"

"Yes, four. I've had a stressful day."

Manny doesn't like his routine broken. I was lying on the couch watching Big Brother.

I laughed. "You!"

"Shut up!" insert sexy laugh. "Stuart needs some where to stay for a few days," said Manny. "Angelo wants him out of the apartment before the weekend."

"You asking me?"

"Could he stay at your place, it's not like you don't know him?"

Ah Stuart, my mind buzzed with a collage of images of me and Stuart in front of my open fire. Huge, hard cock. Big balls. Filthy in the sack. Apparently. Ha, ha, ha. I rubbed down on my cock... and the reality is?

"Nah. I don't want to be a part of their break up. I'm happy here on my own... finally."

"I don't really want him staying here, though," said Manny.

"I've got peace and quiet..." For the first time in my life, really. "I've got an open fire and ice cream."

"I asked him about a threesome..."

"With me and you?"

"Yes..."

"You're obsessed."

Insert sexy Manny laugh.

"Don't be stupid. I know him as a friend."

Like that's been a major concern in the past?

"Why do they put me in this situation," asked Manny. "That's why I love you, you're so chilled. You don't stress."

Stuart asked Manny if he could see a future for the two of them. It was all coming clear to me. They make the perfect couple. And I know I'm going to feel disloyal with this, but Stuart may be bloody handsome, but he isn't the brightest star in the galaxy.

Manny's genuinely sweet. Apparently, Stuart has a nasty streak, by both Manny and Julien's separate admission. But he was Manny's boyfriend of four years, so what am I to know.

Stuart is/was/maybe/third hand/once creepily out of Stuart's mouth, out of it on a dance floor... a seeder, he likes to give HIV to people, share it around. There's a whole... what do you call it, movement, I guess. A group who recognise one another for their own particular fetish... apparently... or something like that.

I still like kissing the best, so what do I know.

Stuart gave it to Manny. I pass no judgment on that, other than to say, do not have unsafe sex with anyone, until you have both fronted at the doctors office together and had a test. It is that simple. Well, not actually simple, no. Sorry. It involves a huge amount of trust and intuition and smarts, to get to that point with someone. So, sorry, if for whatever reason you have unsafe sex with someone you don't know, out of it on whatever, where ever, you only have yourself to blame. It's that simple.

Besides, Manny has forgiven him. So who am I to judge?

Poor Manny, what am I saying? He's far too sweet for Stuart. But he'd know better than me.