I Hate People

David calls to discuss Pieces of a Woman, which he recommended and which I liked, but about which I wouldn't rave. I thought it portrayed the situation well, it was a good story.

It turns out that puppies are just for Xmas. David has put his four month old puppy into care while he tries to re-home her because he can't just can’t cope with her any longer. All the things people generally find charming about dogs, David finds annoying. David has been spending some time with her in the facility.

"You are the only person who understands..."

"Understands what?"

"When I say I hate people." (Remember, David is quite a famous new age guru)

"Oh yes," I say. "They are a dreadful lot."

"Well, now I hate the animal kingdom too," he says. "Have I told you that before?"

"No, that's new," I say. "Is that guilt speaking?"

"Guilt?"

"For making [insert dog's name] an orphan." [truthfully, I can't spell his dog's name, it is one of those new age names with a silent p and a symbol. Eplon_*, or something.]

"It can't be helped."

"Dogs are forever..."

"Yes, yes, so you keep telling me," he says. "I'll find her a lovely new home and she'll have a great life."

"You hope."

"She will."

"Well, look on the bright side, the same global warming that is going to take out the human race, will probably finish off the animal kingdom as well."

“You always make me feel better.”

“All a part of the service.”

"Did I tell you, you are the only one who makes me laugh?"

"Constantly."

We both laugh.