Hanging on Regardless

Hang onto that ticketing machine, girl, white-knucked, determined, tunnel-vision, scared. We're all fearful, I know, taught to be, encouraged – spend, spend, spend, you frightened rabble – dob in a nonconformist (they are probably a terrorist), rat on your neighbour (they are probably a dole bludger, or are cooking up ice), take your place, stand your ground, don't let anyone push you around, even if they are trying to make their way to where they should.

She gazed at me with a defiant stare, as if to say, try to move me.

Move you will, I thought.

I’d walked because there were no trams. They were slow, this morning, well, non-existent, actually, so I walked. Too late to walk all the way to work, as I’d left the house late, but not enough time to hang around the tram stop for a tram that wasn't ever going to arrive. I've learned, don’t wait at the tram stop, as suddenly it can be half an hour later, just start walking. I walked all the way to Spring Street, before a tram appeared, so there was a group of people waiting.

"I need to buy a ticket," I said. Get out of my way you idiot, I thought.

She moved sideways, a fraction, just a suggestion, enough not to be rude, but rude none the less. I had to lean over her, as she doggedly retained her place.

It’s a ticket machine, I thought. People need to use it, but Miss Selfish didn't care. And I’d be the bad guy if I pushed her over, I thought. Go figure? The thought of her landing spread-eagle on the tram floor amused me for long enough to make my purchase. Before I was done, her hand was back on the hand-rail, at the front of the machine, in my way, staking her inconvenient position, regardless.

There was extra change in the coin return, so there is a god, after all, I thought.

"Excuse me," I said, with enough intention to indicate I was coming through if she got out of the way, or not. She rolled her eyes, incredulous and snorted through her nose, as if I was being completely unreasonable. She didn't move more than a whisker. Essentially, she just stood, rolling her torso a centimetre. So, I picked up my brief case and pushed through, dislodging her from her selfish stance. She, kind of, fell sideways, without losing her balance, mores the pity, but I didn't look back, as I slipped through the cabin and, by chance, got myself a seat, as a woman stood up to alight the crowded tram, just as I came through.

So, there you go.