Say it in Italian

Big Mole,

I'm writing in great haste about to catch plane to Naples. It is 4 in the morning – bloody Germans! I have gone off all drugs for (what?) the 7 weeks before Australia so it will affect me somewhat sitting on your lounge. But! What noone told me is how shitty it makes you feel – my God: temperature, cramps, the runs, cold man cold, coughing green stuff, sweats, grumpy etc. But it shall be done. Er, maybe I have the flu.

Yeah, Sydney is a bunch of cunts – busiest time of the year I here.

Even my Mum was going on about Howard on Mothers' Day.

I will read your email in lovely Naples (put him down!) – German guard has already entered room and tippy tapped his watch. We leave at 5 to catch a 20 minute train to then ride 40 mins to then book in for an 8ish flight. It is 4.34. Bloody Germans!

Little Mole (Josh)

Little Mole

I can’t believe how filled with anger and hate I am at the moment. It just occurred to me as I drove home from me mums in the beautiful afternoon sun. It’s my favourite time of the year too, the leaves are turning yellow and red and it truly is glorious and I’m hating the world. Maybe I just need a little more sun, something. My mum’s house is filled with sunshine and light, but of course that it Camberwell, where, I do believe, it is a council regulation or a law of some sort, that there has to be sun shinning for a good part of the time.

The world is full of cunts and they are just getting more cunty by the day. Oh, I so hate the world!

Clearly, this is a fault in me, something about feeling as though I am missing out on something. Maybe it is just sun? But your suggestion is a good one. Maybe it is, indeed, the withdrawal of the dreaded green? I don’t give it much credence in the greater scheme of things, but maybe you are on to something.

I don’t know, life seems so humdrum and ordinary and the conservative powers seem to be getting the strangle hold on societies thinking. Ideas and values that I certainly don’t agree with seem to be taking on.

I’m moving to New Zealand… at least they have a progressive government who is doing good things.

Tony Abbott’s answer to the Aboriginal problem is for them just to choose to eat better and to do a little more exercise. And hey presto, all their problems would be solved.

The picture accompanying this story was one of John Anderson in the front pew of The Fires of God ministry, or whatever the hell it is called, calling for society to develop a greater relationship with God, develop some faith, so as to combat the general malaise of selfishness that has effected society. Yeah, like that would work. Religion equals war doesn’t he realise this.

John Howard has caved into the loggers in Tasmania, resplendent with the puke inducing smile of his, as he toured the area in triumph.

And now I’ve just had my nemesis on the phone – the old cunt over the back – telling me that he has cut down the creeper, suggesting ways that he could fix what remains hanging down. I feel soiled by the fact that his voice has been on my answering machine. Keep the hell out of my back yard or I’ll go ya with a knife!

But you LO. Trains, planes, automobiles, escaping to an exotic local in the dead of the night – of course, Germans are famous for that. How exciting. And off to lovely old Naples to boot. Lucky you, it does vicariously, somewhat, cheer me up. All them Italians! That’s what I need, a gaggle of Italian men to cheer me up. I reckon that would do it. A little espresso, a little sunshine, a little… er, rough and tumble with the under 25 Italian water polo team. (Don't fuck with my fantasy)

Maybe I should go and meditate – except I’ve never been able to shut my mind down for that long. Maybe Pilates or yoga? Oh hell, maybe I need a nice big bag of pot! That sounds more like the ticket.

And how depressing it was getting my camera working. I look so old, in gay terms I think that means 1000 years old. You better come visit quick, before I’m just a corpse.

“There’s no one here at the motel but me and my mother up at the house.”

“Thank you Norman, you have been a great help.”

Marion (Christian)