I wonder if that hurts? Do you think he'd be going one leg at a time? Gout then Gangrene? You know, listing like the Costa Concordia at midnight? Melting into the ground one foot at a time. Can you imagine the skin on his feet bursting and his raw flesh being eaten by beetles and spiders and ants. His nails popping off with the worms pushing through. Half man, half earth mound. Flesh like dust, bones like a tinned sardine, dissolving downwards.
I'd believe that before I believed that he was fucking Ian Thorpe? Really? Who believed that? Why would one of the world's most handsome men settle for, well, lets face it, Ian Thorpe is... (oh, I know I am being mean) not getting, um, prettier with age. I reckon it points towards somebody messing around with plastic surgery.
"Put the Botox down Ian, it is not helping."
 |
| not attractive, like a Latin heartthrob |
Too mean?
Well, quite possibly.
I certainly don't mean to be... er... um...
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