Let’s Get Into It

We were up early, 6.40am, I’m not exactly sure why. It was a crisp, cool morning. Balloons floated overhead as I smoked my first cigarette. Stupid me, still haven’t given up, I plan to give up tonight. The distraction from the real work by the artificial world may just be my window to give up. If I am going to be feeling an altered state anyway, then I may not notice that other altered state of nicotine withdrawal. Giving up is so ridiculous now, as I know it only really takes me twenty four hours now a days, maybe even only a morning. It is just that initial wrench that is hard to deal with.

Sam left at 7.25am.

It was a day of enormous pressure to get everything done. Kerin said she hated working under that pressure as she had no time to check anything. That is one of the problems that they have normally, they don’t really check everything. Kirin has taught Kerin that checking isn’t needed, if not directly, by example. I tried to tell Kerin check twice, consider it done once, but I am pretty sure she didn’t really take it in. She is now too stressed out to really listen. 

The day dragged. Hour by hour. The afternoon was slow. I had my usual response thought to the hours dragging, “and soon it will be Sunday, I thought, and it will all be over.” I’m not sure if I find that comforting, or simply necessary to the time dragging. 

Kirin left at 4pm. Kerin said not long after that I might as well go. I didn’t want to race out the door the moment it was suggested to me,  (not really sure why now? Perhaps it some sort of weird off shoot of manners? Nyr? Shrug?) so I waited for her to say it a second time. Then I waited a few moments longer and then said,

“If there is nothing I can do?” 

Then I left. Also, not exactly sure why, as I’m not answerable to Kerin. 

I got home at 4.15pm. I put washing on straight away. I figured that Sam wouldn’t be home until 5pm. He was meeting our mate Charlie at 4.30pm. Charlie would only have to be fifteen minutes late, not so unimaginable trying to leave work early. I may even have time for the whole load to finish, then I wouldn’t have to worry about it again. It’s a distraction to take my mind off the time going slow. I also wondered if I wanted to possibly wear my new black work shirt on Tuesday to Jeff’s bbq, so I really wanted that washed more than getting the washing over and done with.

I got the towels and carried them up to the bedroom. I covered the bed in one of the flat sheets we never use. I rapped the remote controls in Glad Wrap.

Sam got home at 4.45pm with the terabyte of new gay porn from our mate Charlie.

Got to go, the fun is starting. Its 4.55pm.

Not long after, we had our first pipes. The buzz of it sparkling in the glass pipe. The crystal smoke in my lungs. Oh the taste, that ‘dry ice’ of smoke sucked down. Lighting it again. Lighting it again. Lighting it again. I like it.

I ran downstairs and hung out the wet washing. All that nervous energy pumping through my veins, and now there was something else. 

The new hard drive didn’t look like it was going to run, but Sam seemed to get it working in no time.

I could feel the tingle almost straight away, which was a good sign, after the shit we’d had the last few times. I think we had three pipes to start with.

Then it went kind of whoosh and away we went.

I remember it being 10pm. I remember it being light outside again. I remember the morning rolling in.

The drugs were good, they worked and I lost track of the world around me. I didn’t quite achieve that filthy, out of it mind experience, but I got half way there. I got glimpses of it.